What do you call a fat man that can turn slim REALLY fast? Drew Carey

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Yes.

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why did the cow die because she ate poisoned apple pie

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What's brown and sticky? A stick.

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Why did the woman cry? She was sodomized by wild animals

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What do you call a blind fish? Amblyopsidae.

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The grass is always greener on the side that uses manure and fertilizer daily.

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This is a sentence. This is also a senctence.

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So a jelly bean walks into a bar. The bartender asks him "whatchuu doin here jelly bean" the jelly bean doesn't respond and sits there awkwardly because he neither speaks English nor has the brain capacity to move or breathe. The bartender closes the store and comes back the next day to find the bean in the same awkward position.

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What word is ten letters long and starts with gas? Gastronomy.

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Why did the man Iorn his face? Because he felt like it.

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A handless Asian boy was riding his bike through the park with some friends. One of his friends puts his arms in the air and yells "Look! No hands!" The handless boy rides his bike home, crying and thinking about how one day he would like to say, "Look! No hands!" without people getting nauseous.

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In the movie Dark Skies, little white boys were haunted by a mysterious force. The answer is obvious, isn't it? They are being haunted by Michael Jackson's ghost.

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What did the one lawyer say to the other lawyer? We are both lawyers!!

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have you tasted chocolate flavoured slurpee? no. i haven't either

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You have such a big heart (Girlfriend) The doctor's think dangerously so (Guy)

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Why did the man get fired? Because he had cancer

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Penisland

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im not as random as you think I- Potato

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whats black and white and slides on its belly a penguin

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So the docter saw the girl had a "M" on her chest during surgery. He asked her if he had a boyfreind from Michigan. She said "no, but i have a girlfreind from winsconsin, why do u ask?"rf

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What happens when you click a link on a web page offering sex? You get a virus.

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u know y blondes and tornadoes r so alike? first theres a lot of blowing and sucking, and then u lose ur house!

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What do 9 out of 10 people enjoy? Gang rape.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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