Q: How many babies does it take to paint a house. A: Depends on how hard you throw them.

Why did the train crash? Because the conductor was a cucumber.

You're smart... And I can tell a joke.

What did Batman say to Robin before getting in the batmobile? Robin, get in the batmobile

roses are red violets are blue oranges are......

What makes a catholic priest happier then a visit to the penn state locker room? Introducing Jesus to people and them accepting him as their savior.

What's worse than a bee sting? A katon.

Q: Why did the baby cross the road A: He was stapled to the chicken

what did the american say to the other american? get out of the way i gotta go to mcdonalds!

The Pope

What's blue and pillowy? A blue pillow

What's round and red? A red and round solid.

What's more funny than a dead baby? A dead baby dressed like a clown.

Why did the chicken cross the road? How did the chicken get out of the henhouse?

1st guy: Wanna hear a joke? 2nd guy: Yeah sure. 1st guy: Me too.

What do you call an anorexic with a yeast infection? A quarter ponder with cheese.

Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? Because he didn't have the guts.

Yo mamma's so old... oh way no she's dead

What's the difference between a Jew and a Boy Scout? A Boy Scout comes home from camp.

A farmer had a horse that he rode frequently. He would talk to the horse and tell it it was his closest companion. One day the farmer noticed that the horse was walking funny. So he shot it.

Two men walk into a bar... ..I didn't say what type of bar...

How do you kill half of Mexico? You use nuclear weapons in major cities.

Call me a banana. You're a banana. No I'm not

What happened when the boys visited Penn State? They got toured around campus and decided that it would be their future college.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...