Why did the egg crossed the road? If X = chicken and C = the speed of light, then 2 to the power of the road which is 12 feet across times X/C = egg

Knock knock Who's there Interrupting camel (Interrupt with nothing) Camels can't talk.

how did helen keller break her arm? reading at 100 miles per hour

whats worse then girls playing sport ? girls cutting grass

how do you confuse a blond?

Whats black and has no ring? LeBron James

John Kerry walks into a bar. The bartender looks at him and says, "Hey, why the lost election?"

why do i love my iphone because its a very versatile electronic device with many uses and i can get the anti-joke app

What's the square root of 69 Jimmy? Square root of 69 is 8 something right? Cus I've been trying to work it out oh. Jimmy! It's 8.306623863 >.

Why don't women need watches? Because most people carry cell phones that tells them the time making watches redundant and obsolete.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FbuluDBHpfQ

I could even argue that having blood on your penis is kinda fun sometimes.

An Irishman and an Englishman are having a heated conversation about Rugby in a pub. Another Irish comes to the pub.. He is promptly given a bar stool and menu so that he can order.

Why didn't the boy get what he wanted for christmas? His parents had killed him.

Why can't the blonde dial 911? Because she's being held hostage against her will.

A man walks into a bar, has a drink, pays the bartender, and leaves.

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

Why did the chicken cross the road? We will never know. Chickens are incapable of communicating with humans and thus the intent of the chicken is subject to speculation.

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

The Mexican word of the day is JUICY. Tell me if juicy see the cops.

The class valedictorian is about to give his speech to the class. He has 6 fingers total, he is missing an ear, his left nostril is burned shut, and he must walk on crutches because of the severe injury to his left knee. How does the extremely cruel Principal of the school introduce him? "Please welcome Gregory Barnes, a brave soul that conquered a battle against death itself an won".

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m-BD0nWgoIw

Why can't Billy ride a bike? Because he's a fish

What does a blond see when she looks at a dog? A four legged mammal, refered to as canis lupus familiaris, or what is commonly known as a dog.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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