What did the rapist say to the woman? "If you tell anyone I'll kill you!"

what did Marvin Gay's father say to him before he died? "hey come listen to this 45 real quick"

What came first the chicken or the egg? The chicken god made two of every animal

What do you call a fat black guy in KFC? A guy who likes KFC.

What do you call a girl with no arms or legs on the beach? Sandy What do you call that girl tossed into the water? Sandy Duncan

A scientist walks into a bar. His forehead becomes swollen.

Why did the squirl eat the accorn? Because he enjoys it.

rebecca is a hard worker

I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

What did the nerd say to the bully? Nothing. The bully killed him before he could say anything.

Q /why do people eat dinner? A/ because their hungry

say yes will u remember me in a year?yes will u remember me in a month? yes will u remember me in a week?yes will u remember me in a minute?yes will u remember me in a second?yes knock knock whos there u said u will remember me u dick

Whats worse than getting raped by a giant scorpion? Seeing your mom dance

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It got mercifully trampled by a nearby 18 wheeler.

why did the zack fall off his bike because his mum thew a frege at him

If a woman was born in China, raised in France and got married and died in New Orleans, what is she? Dead.

What did Frodo do when he realized that he needed to destroy the ring? He simply walked into Mordor

Man who wrote "The Hokey Pokey" died. Hard part was getting him into the coffin. They put his left leg in and then the trouble started..

What's the difference between slavery and the Holocaust? Slavery happened.

A black guy stands outside the Tigers stadium with a cigar and tries to sell tickets... noone buys them... I have a comlplete raging boner and I'm gonna go beat off!

What did Aaron Pfeifer say to Zach Faller ? Yee

Q: Why doesn't Micheal Jackson have orgasms? A: Because he's dead.

Two boys were walking down a building which was under construction. Suddenly a brick hits the 1 one in the head while the 2 guys aunt was in America.

Roses are red, Violets are red, Trees are red, Bushes are red, HOLY SHIT MY GARDEN'S ON FIRE!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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