What did the boy with no eyes get for Christmas? Glasses

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What bad thing could happen if you gave a black man a gun? ....stop expecting some racist punchline!

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A man walks into a bar . . . he is tired and thirsty after a long day at work.

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What did one guy say to another? Womens rights..........

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Nicolas Cage

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Your mother is so old that her prom theme was fire

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What do Molly and Sharon have in common? They both annoy me.

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three men get stranded on a island and cannibals find them and they say go find 3 fruits and come back. first guy comes back with three apples and they say we will shuve them in your rectum and if you scream we will kill you he screams he dies. second guy comes back with grapes and he laughs before they can start. and in heaven the first guy says why did you laugh and he says there voices are funny.

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Why can't George Washington drive? Because he died!

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i like tits

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Q: Where did Bethany hide the dead baby? A: In the trash can

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Why are females bad drivers? Because it is hard to drive with pots and pans.

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The class valedictorian is about to give his speech to the class. He has 6 fingers total, he is missing an ear, his left nostril is burned shut, and he must walk on crutches because of the severe injury to his left knee. How does the extremely cruel Principal of the school introduce him? "Please welcome Gregory Barnes, a brave soul that conquered a battle against death itself an won".

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what is the difference between Stephani and a whale? A whale is skinnier... get the harpoonns

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Ring Around The rosy, Pockets full of posey, Just kidding they are roofies and i'm going to rape you

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What's worse than loosing your pen? Getting raped by a pedophile.

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What do you get if you take the head off a Koala and a Wombat and swap them around? A bloody mess and about 4 years in jail.

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What did the chicken say to the dog? Well, since chickens can't talk, they both stood there in an awkward silence.

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"You know what sucks?" "vaccuums?" "you know what meteforically sucks?" "Black holes?" "you what just isn't cool?" "Lava?"

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What happened when the cow jumped over the barbed wire fence? Hopefully it made it over without lacerating its underbelly, thus causing fatal bleeding.

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One time Chuck Norris cried. He felt slightly better after the experience, but, unfortunately, his grandmother still died of cancer.

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Who graduated top of their class, got their degree two years early and lead a very successful life? Not you

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Why did the boy cross the road He didnt he got hit by a car

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Sophie Cameron is Gay

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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