What did the widow get for mothers day A miscarriage

You are so gay you frequently, and consentingly are sodomized by men and frivolously enjoy it.

Why did the President Truman approve the use a nuke over Hiroshima? Sending Chuck Norris was widely considered to be too cruel.

How do you make a clown sad? Kill his family.

Why did Helen Keller cross the road? BECAUSE SHE WAS A BITCH!

Gues what makes me smile Mouth muscles

why did the man die? because he died.

A man is in a bar with a drink A lorry driver come in a gulp the guys drink down The man starts crying the lorry driver says"don't cry I will buy you another" The guy says "it's not that: Today I woke up late for work and when I finally got there my boss fired me so I get in my car to go home and it wont start so I walk home while it's raining and when I got in I found that my wife was sleeping with the gardener so I came down here and asked for some poison and you went and drank it"

What is a pirate's favorite kind of pizza? Cheese.

Women's rights... Are a legitimate concern in today's society.

So Doc... Do I have H.I.V or not? Well... Lets just say you should think positive now... NO! I CANNOT LIVE LIKE THIS *Jumps out window* ...Because the results might not appear correctl... OH you do not have... Where did you go? Phew, Good thing it was first floor! Dont be silly, you dont have an immune system which means you have full blown AIDS

How do you call blond girl with no arms and no legs ? A victim of a tragic car accident.

What does a tree and a human have in common? They both fall if you chop them with an axe.

Why didn't Joe's toaster work anymore? Because he dropped it into the bathtub with him.

In Soviet Russia, You drive the car, fill it up with gas and park it Just like in America

Why did a young boy fall off a building? Gravity.

9/11

What is Justin Bieber + One less lonely girl. A BABY

What did the Buddhist say to the hot dog vendor? I don't eat hot dogs. Thank you though.

what is purple and hairy like a bear? A purple bear

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? - It was dead.

got a new boxing bag the other day its hanging from the top of my stairs its called dead seb

Yo mamma so fat, she probably has Type Two Diabetes - which is often associated with obesity - and should seek medical advice.

Why did the Dr love drop hit guitar? Because a bear walked into a bar and killed everyone in there including dr love and was then shot to death by police and animal control.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...