What job function does a blonde have in an M&M factory? Quality control or some other function.

My bologna has a first name It's O-S-C-A-R... My bologna has a second name It's M-A-Y-E-R... Oscar and Mayer were the names of the pig and the cow that were slaughtered and subsequently processed into the bologna I am eating.

JUSTIN BIEBER PERFUME!

Justin Bieber walks into a bar. <>

Why did Mary fail to consume her breakfatst? Because Suzy has a history of bi-polar disorder as well as anorexia.

Tom buys his wife Mary the latest Eco friendly car. The car is said to get well over 100 miles on a tank of gas. A week later, Tom is stunned to learn that while Mary was driving to the supermarket the car ran out of gas. The tank was full and Mary only drove 5 miles. How is this possible? Mary was involved in a horrible car accident. The gas tank immediately emptied and set fire to Mary and her baby.

if a fat man in a red suit puts you in a bag at night. its not santa your getting raped

What's a pirate's favorite color? Depends on the pirate.

whats worse than seeing a repeated anti-joke? The Holocaust.

Why did the boy lose his watch? Who cares? It was a shitty-ass watch.

A doctor is delivering a baby on April fool's day. He says, "Congradulations, it's a boy." He then says,"April fools! Your child was stillborn."

How do you call a black man selling fruits ? Yes, but I'm not sure

Why didn't the blind girl say hi to anyone? Because she was blind.

What's big and fat? An obese man.

your mumma so fat she stepped on the weight scales and it says to be continued

What did Death say to Life? "Look, I respect that you waited till after I broke up with Sandy to ask her out, but it's still a little akward for me, so although there are no hard feelings, it's probably better if we keep our distance from each other for awhile."

Your Moma so fat, she would roll down a hill.

Why shouldn't you ask Lebron James for change for a dollar? Because in the year 2013 Lebron will tear his ACL and will never able to play the game again. He then won't be able to land a job because he never finished college. After being unable to land a job, he then develops an expensive crack addiction. His house gets foreclosed, and he becomes broke. And is then a homeless broke man who does not even have 4 quarters to his name.

What doesnt have arms and legs? A brick.

im a straight dude and all the gay dudes at school make fun of me oh wait i wrote that backwards

Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

roses are red violets are blue im in class

religion.

Dani barton= lovely

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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