what do you call a black pilot? A) a pilot

how do you kill a blonde? the way you would kill anyone, here are some examples gun knife noose or orange. wait wtf who kills someone with an orange

Why did the man bring the computer to the doctor because it had a virus

what is worst than finding a worm in your apple? finding half a worm in your apple

You know what's never heard of? Father's Day in Camden.

Row, row, row your... Canoe.

I have Alzheimer. What?

What do you call a man with no arms? A cripple.

Why don't NBA basketball players shake hands after a game like players in NHL hockey...? ...Because it's a tradition in then NHL.

I've done a lot of soul searching, and.... I've realized.... the & symbol really looks like a man dragging his butt on the ground.

Why w\s the English man, the French man, the German man, the Indian man, the Chinese man, the Irish man, the American man and the russian man all on a train together? They where going to the olympics.

What is less sanitary than eating food off of the ground? Anal sex.

whats worse than a dead baby? A pile of dead babies and their grieving mothers standing over them. thats what.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Eating the worm

Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

- Knock knock - Those knock jokes are getting old - Indeed. Scratch scratch - MY DOOR

how many babies does it take to paint a house? that is child labor, which is illegal in many countries.

what did the smoker say to the doctor? nothing she died of lung cancer.

What did T Pain say to the skipper of his yacht? I'm on a yacht

Roses are red Violets are blue your mum went to the loo and out came you

What's sad about the Holocaust? well i don't know ,it may or may not have anything to do with you and cause absolutely no sad emotions toward the subject. I for one don't care.........

what do a fish and wood have in common? when they're dead, they float

Q: Why was six afraid of seven? A: Because of Kevin Spacey's chilling performance.

Why is the apple mushy? Because a car ran over it.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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