Jim: "Hey guess what" Bill: "What" Jim: "George Bush got reelected" *Bill proceeds to throw himself into the Atlantic Ocean.*

What do you call a black man who flies a plane? A Pilot

Q: how many oxen does it take to row up the empire state building in half of a green canoe under the purple sun while eating a dead moose with no arms? A: Purple, because snakes have no elbows.

knock knock who's there? no one, but I appreciate the fact you asked.

What do you call a hispanic and black man flying a plane? A pilot and his co-pilot.

i joined the nazis... but 2 days later i found out i am a jew

Why is Kony hated by the kid with ADHD? Hey look a kid being raped while watching his family getting killed.

whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Nothing!!

A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf."

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A pizza doesn't scream in the oven. Ha ha ha ha

The cow went moo

Q: Whats the difference between a Chicken and Your Mom? A: I dont eat the chicken

Why dont you ever see black people at night? Because the majority of people sleep during the night, including the african americans

What's brown, dirty, and smells like feces? Feces

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 ate a dude's face.

Why did the blond put a condom on her hear? So, she would not get hearing ads.

There are two hippopotamus' in a pond cooling off from the hot day. One is named Nathaniel IV and the other Timothy. Timothy asks Nathaniel, "Nathaniel, what day is it today?" Nathaniel then replies," I believe it is Tuesday." Timothy is taken back then replies," How odd. I could've sworn it was Wednesday."

Penis in a butthole. Consentual Sex.

How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They took away privileges that she normally would have had had she not misbehaved.

What's funnier than a dead triceratops? Nothing, nothing at all...in fact this is scary because the triceratops and their other Cretaceous herbivores, have been extinct for over 3.5 trillion years... ........also if you see a dead triceratops, you're probably tripping on LSD.........

Why was the manspenis big Cause he was a lucky bastard

whats Mario's favorite kind of jeans? Denim, denim, denim.

Roses are red, Violets are VIOLET!

A man with a gun walks into a bar. The police are called and the man was killed quickly.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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