There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

Your mother is so old that her prom theme was fire

Why did the man rob a bank? Because he was poor.

Spotto

wanna hear a joke: women's rights

Obama

When life gives you lemons, throw them at pedestrians.

An Irish man walks out of a bra.

A young gay man comes out of the closet to his conservative, Christian parents. Everything went better than expected.

I'm gay. No homo.

What's the difference between women and a bucket? before 1923, women didn't have the right to vote. Bucket's still don't.

What did the man say to his doctor? AHHH AHHHHH OH MY GOD! AHHH OUCH HOLY SHIT FUUUUUUCK!!!... ____/\_____/\_____/\___________________

how do you make a plummer cry? you kill his family

What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Having sexaual relations with your own mother.

hey bill!

A married couple lies in bed, making out. They must really love each other.

What is the unltimate Jewish dilemma? Free pork

A christian was diagnosed with cancer. He refused chemo and prayed to god. Eventually, he died.

A caterpillar walks into a bar. I don't know how he opened the door.

Chuck Norris' punch is so powerful that is falls on the downward slope of the bell curve for punch force of adult males.

A straight black man walks into a gay bar.

Q: Why is the earth round? A: I am Batman.

What do you call a black man climbing a mountain. A mountain climber.

Hey, why are asians yellow and africans brown? I'm colorblind.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...