Knock Knock! Who's there? Banana. Go away.

A man walks into a bar. He orders a drink and then he sits down to enjoy his evening.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

How do you confuse a blonde? Speak to her in a nonsensical language of gibberish you have devised without her being able to understand or translate.

Why did the elephant cross the road? The chicken was on vacation.

A caterpillar walks into a bar. I don't know how he opened the door.

Guns don't kill people. Dangerous minorities do.

Whats green and has 4 wheels? A green car.

Q: What do you get when you cross and owl with a bungie cord? A: My ass

what do you call a cow with no legs? ground BEEF!!!!

If it hadn't been for Cotton Eyed Joe My wife and kids would still be alive.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the sloth fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the monkey.

What's the difference between a pancake? They both taste good with jam

What happened when a 16 year old guy went over to his friends party? found out he wasn't friends with anyone there, got kicked out and committed suicide.

What's harder than nailing a baby to a tree? My penis whilst im doing it.

Q. Why did the Muslim go to hell? A. Because his name was Osama Bin laden.

Why did the little boy drown? He was stapled to a whale.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? AIDS.

why is a squirrel called a squirrel? that's its name.

What do you call a black man with cancer? A very unfourtunate man.

Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

A duck sits down at a bar and orders a drink. After he finishes, he gets up to leave, when the bartender says, "Excuse me, sir, but you didn't pay for your drink." The duck turned around and said, "I'm sorry, I forgot." So he paid the bartender for the drink and left him a nice tip, and left the bar in a good mood.

Your Moma so fat, she would roll down a hill.

What did the doctor say to the patient? You have cancer.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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