"What time is it?" "Time to buy a watch." The homeless man inquiring about the time proceeded to cry.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.????????

thumb_up thumb_down +41

How heavy duty are your nachos? No, because babies simply cannot swallow blenders.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Whats the differance between a lawnmower and a sack of dead babies? I dont have a lawnmower in my garage

thumb_up thumb_down +39

What did the bartender say to the bugatti owner? "Don't drink and drive"

thumb_up thumb_down +39

how much dub would a dubstep step if a dubstep could step dub? purple

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Why did the man eat his hat? Autism.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Try saying "Good Eye Might" without sounding Australian.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

How do you stop a baby from crying? Throw it off the top of the Empire State Building.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

What was the little boy doing in the deep end of the swimming pool? Drowning.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

who steals more than a black person?, a pirate.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

How do you survive the plague? you dont.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Why did your mom cross the road? She Tripped and started rolling

thumb_up thumb_down +35

a dyslexic man came on this website thinking it was made by his aunt Tina keoj he was sadly mistaken. it was just a bunch of jokes about dyslexic men going into bars

thumb_up thumb_down +35

A Muslim boards a plane with his three sons. Everything goes well, because most on the plane are racially tolerant.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Q, whats worst then being trapped in a house with a ghost. A, being trapped in a house with thirteen ghosts.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

I spilled Spot Remover on my dog. Now he is blind and has chemical burns all over his body.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Yo Momma is so fat, she often chooses to take the elevator instead of the stairs.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

tried to think of a great "anti-joke" not creative enough

thumb_up thumb_down +33

A man sees a bum laughing. He asks the bum "Why are you laughing", at which point the bum replies "I'm a bum!"

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Why did the mass murderer abandon his killing spree? He found out it was illegal.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

What disease did the gay man get from his partner? Streptococcus!

thumb_up thumb_down +31

What is the square root of 69? 8.30662386

thumb_up thumb_down +31

A young Asian boy got a B on his test. He went home an showed his parents even though he was nervous of their reaction. They told him that a B was a good grade and put it on the fridge. After that he began to gradually flunk each class one by one because of his parent's inability to push him to be better. He is now homeless and an alcoholic.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops