Why should people with Alzheimer's not tell jokes? .......................................................................................................................................... SEVEN EIGHT NINE!!!!!

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how many babies does it take to screw in a light bulb? there are no babies they are all dead in my garage

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What did the catholic priest say to the naked boy where are your clothes?

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What do a squirrel and a cucumber have in common? They both cant ride bikes

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your on a bus and you ask your math teacher if you got the answers on the homework right and the bus crashes in the middle of an intersection.

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I like my women how I like my salad. Without a penis.

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why was little johns' stomach in discomfort? because his mom accidently gave him mercury for breakfast

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A duck walked into a bar. He asked for a drink and the bartender gave him it

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What's green and has wheels? A green car.

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McDonald's... Giving people with swag jobs since 1942.

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what did the blind man say as he past the fish market? he asked one of the fisherman if they had any fresh catch that day and bout three tuna steaks for his wife and son

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What's the difference between a red Ferrari and a pile of deal babies? The red Ferrari is not in my garage right now.

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There's a pair of siamese twins.....One of them's gay.

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Not Steve Jobs

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what said the girl when the roof collapsed over her nothing she died

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders house? yea, neither has he.

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A black guy, a white guy and a Pakistani are walking together when they see a lamp, They rub the lamp and out pops a Genie who, with only three wishes to grant, lets them have one wish each. The Pakistani wishes that all people of Pakistani origin are returned to their country with health and wealth. The black guy thinks this is a good idea and asks for the same for all Africans and Caribbean's. The white guy says "are there really no more Pakistani's or blacks in the country?" The Genie confirms this is accurate. The white guy is devastated, who will drive the buses, operate the power stations, produce the medicines and work in the hospitals that these people did? I wish for them to be returned.

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A man walks into a bar. The ceiling was ringed with dozens of TV’s, much like your average sports bar. Unlike your average sports bar however, the TV’s were not featuring athletic competition. That is unless you consider vigorous and explicit gay sex between men hung like Tijuana mules to be a sport.

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natalie wilson is a hilarious stripper

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If someone throws a fridge at the boy then they must be exceptionally strong because fridges weigh more than the average human can lift therefor he has a good future ahead of him but will have to live with the fact that he hurt a small child

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Question: What is black and white and read all over? Guess: A newspaper? Answer: No. A zebra that was shot by a poacher. Poaching is a serious problem all over the world and should be looked down upon by all. It is not something to joke about.

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Your mother is so fat, that the doctor said, "Go on a diet or you will get a Cardiac Infarction."

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What's the difference between Hitler and shit? Shit has a shower in the morning.

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What is red and does not cry? Half a baby.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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