What is worse than seeing your whole family die? Leaving your wallet on the bus.

If you give a mouse a cookie... ...you're destroying its natural diet. It might die.

what did the orphan say to the adults wanting to adopt him? i hope u will provide well living conditions because i have lost both of my parents and am forced to live off one meal a day

why did Suzie fall off the swing? she had no arms. knock knock? whos there not Suzie

Its a bird! No, it's a plane! Oh... so it is.

Why did the rabbit fall out of the tree? because it was dead Why did the bird fall out of the tree? because it was stapled to the rabbit

Woman's rights.

How do you save a black guy from drowning? You don't.

Why does Snoop Dogg need an umbrella? Fo' Drizzle

If a tree falls, and nobody is around to hear it, does it still make a sound? No. While the falling tree surely creates mechanical oscillations in the air, sound is defined as the mechanical oscillations in the air perceived by humans. Therefore, since no humans were around to hear the tree fall, it did not create a sound.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Unfortunately there are billions of chickens in the world and based on the question it is not possible to determine which specific chicken is being referred to. Even if we were able to ascertain this knowledge it would be unlikely that we could determine its purpose, as chickens don't usually make decisions based on logical thought.

why is 6 afraid of 7 ? because 7 is black.

What do you call a crocodile in a dentist? I have no idea, but I'd hate to be that dentist.

why couldn't the boy eat his oreo's? His sister ate it.

whats one word that gets everyones attention? rapist,bomb,and sex

69

What is the difference between a duck? It can neither ride a bike.

A man got a promotion at work. Now he makes more money.

call 803-389-9808 for a good time ;D

YO MAMA SO SHORT she should really consider wearing long tunic-like blouses, prints that contain vertical stripes, and heeled shoes with a pointed toe in order to create the illusion of length to her silhouette. That having been said, society's limited definition of beauty is quite inadequate for the diverse world in which we live.

Knock Knock Whose there. Mike Mike seriously I told you to stop coming here or ill call the police But I just wanted to talk to you Ok thats it im calling the police

How do you kill a dinosaur with a spoon? You cant because they are extinct creatures

How do you get an asian out of a rice field? Napalm.

why do elephants eat peanuts? so they can save the wrappers for valuable prizes

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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