What's worse than being the last man on earth with thousands of women to please? Realizing that you are gay and there are no men left.

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Knock Knock Who's there? UPS UPS who? UPS, your package is here.

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Why do babies cry on airplanes? Because gay people are getting married.

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Person A - I farted Person B - YUCK

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Omar the Magnificent is performing a huge magic show at a theater in New York City. His final trick will be to have his assistant saw him in half in front of the sold out crowd. Omar never knew how other magicians perform the trick. The crowd of hundreds watches Omar's assistant brutally murder him onstage and many require mental therapy for years to come.

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What is worse than falling down the stairs? Having leukemia.

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There once was a man in Peru Who dreamed he was eating his shoe He awoke with a fright In the middle of the night To find that someone was breaking into his house

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What's red and u drink it Koolaid

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what do you say to someone acting like an idiot? hey, if you keep acting like an idiot im gunna hit you with a freakin bat , you stupid fubu!

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Tom has 24 cupcakes Tom then ate 24 cupcakes what does Tom have? Diabetes Tom got diabetes

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Why did the little boy throw his clock out of the window? After hours of searching for the snooze button to no avail, the little boy became so irritated at the incessant ringing of the alarm that he threw it out of his window in a fit of rage. The clock landed on an old woman who was walking twenty stories below. She was immediately killed on impact.

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Q: Why was 2 afraid of 3? A: Cause 3 4 5!

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If a tree falls, and nobody is around to hear it, does it still make a sound? No. While the falling tree surely creates mechanical oscillations in the air, sound is defined as the mechanical oscillations in the air perceived by humans. Therefore, since no humans were around to hear the tree fall, it did not create a sound.

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This is you cat This is just cat This is wasted cat This is your cat This is time cat This is reading cat This is this cat Now read the third word of every sentance

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What did the hooker get for christmas? Herpes

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Q) Whats wet fishy and gets caught by fishermen? A) fish.

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Jamie stegman has no life he is a nerd while his sister is giving him a z-j while jacob comes in and starts rubbing the lamp and then the crazy man ate the orange then farted in all of there face. NeonFAILsky xoxo

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Penis

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Why did Billy fall of his bike HE HAD NO BIKE

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Two Jews walk into a bank. They make a deposit and leave.

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What's small, cold, and lifeless? A dead baby.

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How do you get a hot blonde to do your laundry? At knife point.

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If you say woman really fast it sounds like make me a sandwich.

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Your Mama is so fat, when she jumped on the couch, she broke the couch.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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