Yo momma is so fat I really feel sorry for her.

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why are black people so good at basketball? Because they can shoot steal and run and they keep brass knuckles in there waste band.

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A man goes to his doctor and his doctor says, "I've got good news and bad news, which do you want first?" The man says, "The good news." The doctor says, "You were supposed to say the bad news, now you've ruined the joke."

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What did the clock say? The time.

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A black guy, a white guy and a Pakistani are walking together when they see a lamp, They rub the lamp and out pops a Genie who, with only three wishes to grant, lets them have one wish each. The Pakistani wishes that all people of Pakistani origin are returned to their country with health and wealth. The black guy thinks this is a good idea and asks for the same for all Africans and Caribbean's. The white guy says "are there really no more Pakistani's or blacks in the country?" The Genie confirms this is accurate. The white guy is devastated, who will drive the buses, operate the power stations, produce the medicines and work in the hospitals that these people did? I wish for them to be returned.

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I walked into a bar the other day and ordered a double. The bartender brought out a guy who looked just like me.

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What is the difference between a duck. One of its legs are both the same.

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Why did the Mexican put away the Marijuana? Because he was a Police Officer

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Oh no! My life is ruined!

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Why are you reading anti-jokes? ... why are you looking at me like that? I asked you a question, idiot.

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What's longer then Hitlers gas bill Chris Browns Penis

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1 + 1 = 3

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Bill:Ask me to do something. Bob:Go get me a beer Bill:Would you like fries with that?

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There once was a man from Nantucket who had an affinity for wicker furniture.

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How can you put 2 elephants in a bottle without touching each other. You put an elephant between them.

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Why did the rose look so brown? Because it was dead

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Why didn't the boy get what he wanted for christmas? His parents had killed him.

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what happens when you get ben roethlisberger, and a young college student? a very pleasant evening, helping ben cope with all the drama he has been in the past year leading him to the 2011 super bowl against the green bay packers.

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Making a good analogy is like making a chocolate sundae; either way there are simply no reindeer left, and the glass of water you once had is now gone.

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2 dogs one jar of peanut butter

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What's the best thing about twenty six year olds? There are 20 of them.

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Did the chicken cross the road? No because it was in a fenced in area like all farm animals should be

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If a tree falls in the forest does a woman hear it? Probably, but the real question is why is there a tree in the kitchen?

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A boy asks his father how babies are made. The father responds, "Babies are created via coital sex. A man rhythmically inserts his erect penis into a woman's vagina until he ejaculates. If his semen successfully fertilizes her egg, a baby will slowly grow in her uterus. After roughly forty weeks of gestation, the baby will be born."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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