How many dead babies can you fit in the trunk of a car? Depends on how much you compress them.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Why did the little boy drop his Ice cream? He had no arms(:

thumb_up thumb_down -33

What did the Jewish boy get for Christmas? Jews don't celebrate Christmas

thumb_up thumb_down -33

A man and a woman are alone, the man holds her down and says I'm going to rape you! The woman replies I'm not into that and leaves unharmed

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Why did the man go to the toilet with his brother? Because Mario and Luigi had to go down in it.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

-Knock Knock -Who's there? -To. - To Who? -To whom.

thumb_up thumb_down -37

There are 263 birds on a fence, a farmer shot 1 how many are left? 0 the rest flew away.

thumb_up thumb_down -37

Why could the woman not play the game monopoly? Because she did not own the game monopoly

thumb_up thumb_down -39

lyren is a big meanyhead

thumb_up thumb_down -41

How do you finish your homework? Get your dog to eat it.

thumb_up thumb_down -51

Why was 6 scared of 7? Because 7 raped and murdered 8.

thumb_up thumb_down +66

What happened when the turtle rolled over on his back? It proceeded to die because it couldnt find a way to roll over. An African tribe then decided to make the recently decised turtle into a delicious soup that lasted him and his family three days.

thumb_up thumb_down +64

how do you get someone out of a chair? hit him with a shovel

thumb_up thumb_down +60

A Muslim walked out of a bomb shop.

thumb_up thumb_down +58

what did the man see in the mirror? Nothing, he was blind.

thumb_up thumb_down +58

What happened when Aladdin rubbed his lamp? It got slightly cleaner.

thumb_up thumb_down +58

Why did so many white people vote for obama? They strongly believed in what he had to say, and believed he was the right person to lead our country during its troubled times.

thumb_up thumb_down +56

Yes, finally caught that mouse!

thumb_up thumb_down +56

Why was little billy sad? He had a crouton stuck up his asshole.

thumb_up thumb_down +52

Q: What's fat and smelly? Q: What's worse than Nikki Manaj? Q: What's the bane of everyone and everything's existence? A: Kim Kardashian

thumb_up thumb_down +52

Why couldn't little Sally talk? Someone stapled her tongue to wall.

thumb_up thumb_down +50

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks "what would you like to drink?". The horse, unable to comprehend english, just nods and proceeds to shit on the floor

thumb_up thumb_down +50

"Penis, penis, penis..." says Chase. That is all he likes and he fondles horse testes.

thumb_up thumb_down +46

An Englishman, an American, and an Australian walk into a bar. They speak English to each other.

thumb_up thumb_down +46

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops