What did the man with scissors do? He cut his balls off.

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FAP

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What did the German say when the whole of India blew up: "Wow, das muss eine gewaltige Explosion haben! Wie haben sie das geschafft?"

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A Jew, a Mormon, and an Atheist walk out of a bar. They all get in a car with the Jew driving. They were all deceased do to the fact of a very large car accident. Know your limits. Don't drink and drive!

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What do you call a gay lion tamer. It depends on their name.

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What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball? Good friends enjoying a summer activity.

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Why did the airplane crash? It was hit by a flying refrigerator.

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Once upon a time.

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Why did 6 hook up with 7 ?

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What's gay and ugly? An ugly gay.

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How do you jump off a bridge? You jump

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What do you call a black man on the moon? An Astronaut.

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Why did the chicken cross the rode? It was being chased by a fox and did not want to be eaten.

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Now this is a story all about how, my life got flipped, turned upside down. Now I'd like to take a minute, just sit right there, and I'll tell you how I lost my job at the tire plant, and how, being out of work and unable to find a new job, I was unable to pay my mortgage. The bank repossessed my house, my wife left me and took custody of the kids, and I ended up having to sell all my remaining possessions and move to a new city in order to try and find employment.

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Why did the guy not pet the dog? He was allergic.

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I went to the game and saw a Mexican wave. So I waved back at him.

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why did the one handed man cross the road? to get to the secondhand shop.

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what is worse the Holocaust or slavery? patantan!

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You know those people that learned the true name of God, as God asked kindly... ...Well you know God can be nice sometimes but he actually COMMANDED they keep his name secret forever? They became the first people known as Jehova`s witnesses... JEHOVAH<<< SECRET NAME ANYBODY? So much for keeping his secret name guys! They claim that only a few thousand humans will ascend to heaven, in other words all of the JEHOVA`s witnesses... All two billions of them or something... For keeping his name (Cough JEHOVAH) secret. SUCCESS!

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What do you call someone too young to drink? A minor

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why did billy drop his ice cream? he got hit by a plane that a loaf of bread was driving

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And the winner of Miss America 2050 is... Britney Spears!

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how do you drown a blonde? strategically place a scratch and sniff sticker at the bottom of a swimming pool (or just a regular sticker because, quite honestly, they won't be able to tell the difference as the water fills their lungs)

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The club cant even handle me right now Because theyve reached their limit of people allowed in

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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