I'm banging your sister.

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A man buys a kitten from the store. He gets home, takes it out of its cage, and realizes that it wasn't the kitten he wanted. He then returns to the store and exchanges for the kitten he originally wanted, but then decides to keep both because he is feeling particularly hungry.

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Parents: What do you want for your birthday? Boy: A yellow ping pong ball. 7th birthday P: What would you like for your birthday son? B: A yellow ping pong ball 13th birthday P: What would you like for you birthday son? B:A yellow ping pong ball. P:Hmm, fine. 17th birthday P: What would you like for your birthday son? B: A yellow ping pong ball. P: That's is I'm getting you a car! Day before 18th the boy drives into a bridge. He lies in his hospital bed and his parents are there. P: What would you like for you birthday tomorrow? B: A yellow ping pong ball. P: Fine. Why do you want these ping pong balls anyway? B: Because. And then he died.

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Whats better than winning a Paralympic Gold Medal? Having Legs.

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A: What do you call a Jew with only one arm on Christmas? B: An amputee.

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Why cant penguins fly? because they cant

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What's faster than a Jew running after a penny? A car.

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How did the blonde girl get pregnant? Her boyfriend used a condom left in his pants and then was washed. Making it defective and causing her her to become pregnant.

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save water shower with friends

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, The Holocaust. And also cancer.

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Why did Susie fall of the swing? She didn't have any arms. Knock knock Who's there Not Susie

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a blind man walks across a road. he's dead

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Q: What is the difference between everything and nothing? A: everything! Moral: NOTHING!

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What do you call a black man? Jamal

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Matt Damon

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Yo momma is so fat, I gave her a cupcake and she enjoyed it.

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knock knock whos there? the police, your under arrest

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why did the kid get chemotherapy? because he had cancer

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Why did the chiocken cross the road? There's no such thing as a chiocken.

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The answer: He is dead! (read it throughout so you cant go wrong) Question: So why cant a man in Italia marry his widows sister? Moral: Had yet to read one like this one...

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Why did the old man wander into the highway? He hated his life.

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Whats an Anti-Joke? Funny

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I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one animal there and it was a dog. It was a shitzoo

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Knock Knock Who's There? Mom Mom who? Open the door idiot

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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