Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. :D

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How much does a polar bear weigh? The average male weights approximately 1150lbs.

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Bye, Ax... Nerochan, you just gonna leave me in this state? I mean wont you stop it? I know hypnosis and all but I mean I have like black belt in hypnosis but since you began it, I do not really want to stop it.

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#1 rule in arguments: if losing, start correcting their grammar

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(Knock Knock) Who's there? You were late paying your mortgage and now your house is being repossessed by the bank.

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why did the baby bird fall out of the nest? while the mother bird was away a cat knocked over the nest. needless to say the baby bird died.

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Why didn't the man cross the road? He was paralyzed.

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Yor Mama is soooooooooooo fat, when she looked in da mirror... it cracked.

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What's worse than missing Taco Tuesday? Your whole family dying in a car crash.

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How do you tell if there is an elephant in your refrigerator? Check for footprints in the butter.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have ADHD, Oh look a butterfly...

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If you are a girl reading this! why did you stop making some food?

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What did Pikachu tell Ash? "Pikachu."

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what are you called if your really funny but you not smart? the class clown

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The answer: He is dead! (read it throughout so you cant go wrong) Question: So why cant a man in Italia marry his widows sister? Moral: Had yet to read one like this one...

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The graduate with a Science degree asks, "Why does it work?" The graduate with an Engineering degree asks, "How does it work?" The graduate with an Accounting degree asks, "How much will it cost?" The graduate with a Liberal Arts degree asks, "Do you want fries with that?"

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What's the difference between an elephant and a toaster. A lot of things.

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An Asian teenager bought his first gun, and proceeded to go hunting with his father in the wilderness.

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What do you call a gay woman who likes to smoke cigarettes? A lesbian with a possible nicotine addiction.

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A man sees a bum laughing. He asks the bum "Why are you laughing", at which point the bum replies "I'm a bum!"

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Why did Jimmy fall off his bike? He had no arms… Why did he have no arms? Jimmy was a potato

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Penis

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did you hear about the man who crossed the road? he made it.

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Why did Sam have no friends? Because he was dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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