Why was the little girl crying? She got slapped with a porcupine.

Whats red and hurts if it hits you in the face? a brick

Does it not sound kinda fun to keep slapping someone that always turns the other cheek?

what do you call a little girl next to a mexican? a rape victim.

Steve: Hey ask me if Im a Pelican. Bob: Are you a pelican? Steve: YES.

Why were little Suzie's parents crying? Suzie was kidnapped by Al Qeada

what's worse than a hole in your sock? Getting raped!

how do you make money? you roba bank! :)

Two men walk into a bar. The third one ducks.

How do you stop a fire breathing dragon from breathing fire? Shove a hose down its throat.

Penis.

I saw a butterfly yesterday with no wings so I poured some red bull on it and BAM! it drowned.

The Treatment of Steve Bartman

Whats better than winning a Paralympic Gold Medal? Having Legs.

Q: How do you learn the best break dance moves? A: I don't know. You figure it out.

The Irish man was sober.

Parents: What do you want for your birthday? Boy: A yellow ping pong ball. 7th birthday P: What would you like for your birthday son? B: A yellow ping pong ball 13th birthday P: What would you like for you birthday son? B:A yellow ping pong ball. P:Hmm, fine. 17th birthday P: What would you like for your birthday son? B: A yellow ping pong ball. P: That's is I'm getting you a car! Day before 18th the boy drives into a bridge. He lies in his hospital bed and his parents are there. P: What would you like for you birthday tomorrow? B: A yellow ping pong ball. P: Fine. Why do you want these ping pong balls anyway? B: Because. And then he died.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it had cancer.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the other birds had taken hostage the chickens family.

what did helen keller say when she dropped a box on her toe. nothing. helen keller cannot speak

A black man walks into a bar with a parot on his shoulder. The bartender says "Hey you can't bring that in here!" The Parot replies "Sorry i'll have him wait outside."

A man walks into a bar. Several hours later he staggers out and drives into an oncoming school bus, killing all occupants. He survives to live with the grief for the rest of his life and attempts to commit suicide several times.

A brunette, a blonde, and a redhead walk into a bar. There is also a woman with black hair standing outside, and the man next to her is bald.

how do you get to your favorite chinese restaurant? Wok.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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