Me: Whats your favorite color? Joe: Blue! Me: Wrong

What's gay and ugly? An ugly gay.

WHY DID THE CHICKEN FART SO LOAD TO GET EVRYYBODY ATENTION

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

knock knock. who's there? someone.

Bob:well Joe, its been tough latley, I hats my life Joe: I don't give a tuck, ur retarded, you have never had any friends and I am sure that the school will have a pep fest when u hang ur self in ur bedroom. So go now! I don't know why u even r talking to me and I don't know why I am responding

Out on the playground of a school, extremely young kids are acting as living witness to an audacious thing. They're watching a very interesting display of strength and brutality. They're observing a enactment of lofty potential and great might. What're they watching? They're regarding their principal getting promptly arrested by the federal police for possession of technically illegal weaponry including, but not only limited to what looked like to them: peculiar "fire crackers" and reloadable "candy dispensers". In the ensuing battle, their principal got shot in the arm and a random pedestrian got killed by a stray bullet. In the end, the cruel joke's on them. Guess what? They're irrepairably damaged for the rest of their life.

whats woorse then being stupid? kaelynn... aka big head

A man buy's a new lawn mower, it breaks so he takes it back. The shopworker says that if you don't have a recipt then you cannot replace it, the man goes home and months later catch's a flu.

Why did the chicken refuse to cross the road? Yo dawg, dat chicken saw dat hoe Sally crossin da road, dat biatch got hit wit a fridge. Dat chicken was like "hell naw, yall must be trippin, i aint finna die over dat shiet homie, peace!"

whats blue and fuzzy?.... blue fuzz

Why did the tomato blush? Because it began to ripen.

What did little jimmy get for Christmas? A box containing the malevolent soul of a 10,000 year-old demon determined to torment his cat.

What do you call someone who takes a toaster into their bath? Adele's number one fan.

You know what is not cool? Fire.

What's worse than being punched in the face? Being lynched.

Why did the Jewish boy grab his groin? Because he was just circumcised.

And the winner of Miss America 2050 is... Britney Spears!

What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? Nothing. You already told her twice.

Why don't they sell pharmaceuticals in the rain forest? Because it is to sparsely populated and not economically viable.

Roses are red Violets are blue Refrigerators come in an assortment of colors

I dumped this chick who was cross eyed. I thought she was seeing other people.

Roses are red Violets are penis

Why did the gum cross the road? It was stuck to the chickens foot.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...