How much did the Holla Cost?

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A 14 year old walks into a bar. The bartender yells "Hey, no minors allowed here!" A 14 year old walks out of a bar.

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Why did Susie fall of the swing? She didn't have any arms. Knock knock Who's there Not Susie

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Q: What is black, white, and red all over? A: A nun in a blender.

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Did I tell you about the day I put PaulMckenna on a hypnotic state so he believed he put me in a trance? That was fun, everybody applauded, then he got sad when it was not him they where applauding at, funny guy, a bit of an amateur, he spends hours "priming" people in a hypnotic state, and then in his videos triggers it so it makes it seem like he does it instantly, next to Igor Ledohowsky and Richard Bandler, I might just be one of the best and youngest hypnotists alive. Speaking of which, my wife knows the complicated yet strong feelings I got for you, and feels safe around me because of the same reasons you do, and the fact that I can spot a worry and a tear before people do, especially those I love and care about. Wait I am not done, I just need to eat before I space out.

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tried to think of a great "anti-joke" not creative enough

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A man walked into a bar, was surprised to find his wife with another man, and had a heart attack.

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It was just Michael J. Fox's birthday I wonder if he got in trouble for shaking his presents.

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Why did the old man wander into the highway? He hated his life.

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A chicken cross's the road it dies when a car runs it over

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Why didn't the black man feed his family? They'd eaten about an hour ago.

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs on the front porch? Matt What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a hole? Phil What do you call a man with no arms and no legs floating down the river? Bob

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YOLO MAH BROLO

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Why did the plane crash? There was a horrible mechanical error that caused the main engines to fail.

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My penis is small, Just kidding, it's huge.

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oh hiya come in

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What do you get after putting bread in a toaster? -Toast.

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a man walks into horse bar

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Steve,Jerry and tom all go into the mens toilets, because they are men.

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Roses are red, violets are blue and the sun is very hot

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Q: What's a Mexican's favorite sport? A: Cross Country

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What call a duck with no wings? A deformity.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Child Protection Services. ...............

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Do you like flowers NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO NOW GET ME A COKE! And a pizza

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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