What do you call a kid with no arms, no legs, and an eyepatch? Names.

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Roses are black, Violets are black, Everything is black, I am blind.

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How could problems have been avoided in the old west? Bigger towns

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A priest a rabbi and an iman are stuck in the desert. After walking for days without rescue or civilisation in sight, and rapidly running out of food and water, they decide to each pray to their respective gods for rescue, and in doing so solve the ultimate question of which religion is the true religion. They all die.

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A little boy started choking on a condom. His father came and was in a great panic. "Please don't leave me. I don't want to lose you!" he cried over and over again. Then his wife came in and said "it's alright darling, there's plenty more in the drawer". "Oh, thank God for that, I thought I lost it there!" dad replied.

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Q: What is black, white, and red all over? A: A nun in a blender.

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Rather rich and healthy, then poor and sick.

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Did you know every 46 seconds somebody commits suicide Thumbs up for pancakes!

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What time is it when an elephant sits on your car? 12:00

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It was just Michael J. Fox's birthday I wonder if he got in trouble for shaking his presents.

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Nothing finding a worm in an apple is disgusting because worms are disgusting creature that shouldn't live in an apple

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What's the difference between Google Chrome and Bing? Not much. They are both very reliable and informative internet browsers.

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you were my brotha, from another motha, you touch my girl, ill leave you dead in the gutta.

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twilight

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Why did the Chicken cross the road? Because, the Farmer had treated the Chicken and the rest of his family with great distaste, thus angering the Chicken to the point of rebellion against the Farmer with hopes of inspiring the other abused farm animals to act likewise.

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Why did the old man wander into the highway? He hated his life.

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Why did the tree get mad at the bush? It didn't. Bushes are inanimate objects, and so are trees.

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A horse cantered into a bar.

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what do you call a black pilot? A) a pilot

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What do you get if your mailman drops your letter in black paint? Blackmail

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Why cant penguins fly? because they cant

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What did george washington say before he and his troops crossed the delaware river? We are going to cross the delaware river. R...

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Who is a knob? ross d

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Your mom was diagnosed with aids. Her prognosis was 6 months....clearly this joke is about the Holocaust.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops