What is the answer to the universe? I would tell you but you would get board.

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A priest, a rabbi, and a whale sit down at a bar. The priest says to the bartender, "Jesus Christ is our savior." The rabbi responds, "No. Our savior has not yet been born." To which the whale adds, "MMMUUURRRAAAAAAOOOUUU!!!"

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I was dropped on my head as a baby, kjhgfiehcgbfbjebfiuheggfcug

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What do you do when a blonde throws a hand grenade at you? Run.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? he wanted to.

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Roses are red Violets are blue this poem makes no sense Potato

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What do you call a black person that went to medical school? A doctor

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There were two oranges in a bowl. One orange said to the other "Hello my orange friend". The other orange screamed because he did not know oranges could talk.

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when geese fly in a V patteren why is on side longer than the other? not as many geese on that side

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Doctor, Doctor, I feel like I don't know anyone... Uh...who are you?

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How do you teach your daughter to stop wetting the bed? Cut her best friends eye-lids off at her birthday party.

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning sorted by their relative IPA chartings, to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners.

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A Tatooine moisture farmer, an old man, an astromech droid, and a potocol droid walk into a cantina at Mos Eisley Space Port. The bartender says, "Hey, we don't serve their kind here! Your droids will have to wait outside." The moisture farmer then says to his droids, "Why don't you wait out by the speeder, we don't want any trouble." The protocol droid replies, "I heartily agree, sir."

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Q:Ask me if I'm a tree Are you a tree A: No

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Why did the pig have a band-aid? Because he had a whole in his foot.

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Q.) How do you fit a baby into a bowl? A.) With a blender! Q.) How do you get it out? A.) With Tostitos! -Sebastian and Chris (aka 100 and Zelot) (we did not make this joke, we just had to share it)

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What's worse than biting into your apple and finding a worm in it? Biting into you apple and finding two worms in it.

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What is brown and gurgles? dead baby casserole

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your mama so dumb her iq point is below average

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Why did Thomas miss school? Because he was sick

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how do you get a baby to stop swinging from a fan whack it with a shovel

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Women.

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What did the black man say to the Mexican? What a fine day it is!

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Knock knock. Who's there? Sam, your doorbell isn't working.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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