When life gives you melons, youre probably dyslexic.

What's the difference between a large pizza and a Mexican? A large pizza can feed a family.

Three surfers paddle out into the surf. They had a pretty good time, except one of them got a shit ton of water up his nose.

Q: why do shower heads have 11 holes? A: Jews only have 10 fingers

Why can't Jimmy walk ever again? Because when he was 12 his father mistook him for a plank of wood a sawed his legs off. We may realise here that this prohibits him from walking.

#scabbers

What type of vision does an Asian person have? 0-0 because he is blind

" Hey you have something on your face. " ( man speaking punches the guy he was talking to ) " It was pain."

Knock knock. Who's there? Not Heath Ledger.

Why did the white man kill the black man? Because he was a racist that didn't care much for black people or their ways.

What did the innocent little girl get for Christmas? Lymphoma.

Why can't woman be cokcy? Because that don't have one (Sorry for the sexist joke, to who it may concern)

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because he was a pussy.

How do you stop 5 black guys from raping a girl? You call the proper authorities. Don't try to be a hero.

What do you call a black man in the olympics? An olympian.

Buy one packet of condoms for the price of two packets of condoms, and you will be given a second packet of condoms ABSOLUTLEY FREE!

What do you call a gay lion tamer. It depends on their name.

So my girlfriend says I'm a pedophile. What does she know she's nine.

Q: how do you crush a Chinese man's dreams? A: tell him he is worthless and will never prosper.

Roses are red voilets are blue,you are gay so fuck you,!

What did Connor say to the fat man? Dude ur extremely fat.

Why did the bartender cry when a construction worker ordered a Jack and Coke? His son Jack had run away five years ago to sell cocaine; his father hadn't seen him since.

What's green and has wheels? A snow flake. I lied about the wheels, and the color.

How does a penguin make pancakes out of skis? Purple because it's the best.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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