Why did the elephant fall out of the tree? Because he was dead. Why did the second elephant fall out of the tree? Because ie was glued to the other one. why did the third elephant fall out ot the tree? Because he thought it was a game. why did the tree fall? Because there were elephants in it.

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Why did the Chicken cross the road? Because, the farmer lacked basic fence mending skills

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Why'd the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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A child is in the grocery checkout with their parents. It sees the candy display and asks for a pack of Reese's. When the parents do not grant the child's request, they begin to scream and cry. When they arrive home, the child is beaten with a copper rod. The new puppy that the child got for a birthday present is hanged and fed to buzzards.

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An Asian Woman is late and is driving her car very fast to her daughters wedding. She arrives at a reasonable time to witness the whole event.

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why did the first monkey fall out the tree? he was dead why did the second monkey fall out the tree? he was hit by the first one why did the third monkey fall out the tree? peer pressure why did the fourth monkey fall out the tree? he thought it was a game

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What's the difference between Bobby and a plane? Bobby can be sexually molested.

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why was the chinese man so good at math it was his favorite subject

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What's white and flies around ? A seagull. What's black and flies around ? A seagull in the darkness.

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what do men with small penises use as condoms? appropriately sized condoms.

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whats worse then biting into an apple and finding a worm? A naked chinese man jumping out of your trunk to beat you with a crowbar.

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why was the man gay? because he likes men.

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What does a dog do in his spare time? Lick himself.

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I have two hands. Some people dont.

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A man runs over a woman with his car, whose fault was it? The woman's for trying to cross the street in the dark without a crosswalk.

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When life gives you lemons... wait that wont happen

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A white man and a black man enter a public toilet. They both start to pee, and the white man looks over to the black man. He is dissappointed to find that the blackman's penis is not large according to stereotype, and then feels embaraased at his latent homosexuality. They both leave, never seeing eachother again. The white man cries himself to sleep that night. 'I've been hiding too long' he thinks.

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Whats the difference between a black baby and a white baby? the black baby is black

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Whats red and eats like dog? A fox.

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conrad profit

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Roses are red Violets are blue I hate sex Especially with you

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What do you get if you cross a sheep and a kangeroo??? ... A sheep cannot be crossed with a kangaroo because the genes from sheep cannot work with genes from a kangaroo to produce hybrid sheegaroos or kangareeps.

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THIS IS SPARTER!!! :3

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How do you stop a baby from falling into a manhole? You catch it, and then call the appropriate services and inform them of the dangerous open manhole.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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