what did the ninja say to the watermelon nothing that was chuck norris's watermelon

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A guy walks into a bar. He's an alcoholic and it's destroying his family.

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Q: what did the common cold say to the cough? A: you are SO annoying!

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What did Adam Sandler get for Christmas? Nothing, he is Jewish

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Knock. Knock. Who's there? Sgt. Richard, here... your son was raped many times by Iranian soldiers, then forced to make love to many goats and had his limbs chopped off.. he will never be able to walk, talk or poop without assistance again. OH MY GOD, NO!.. WHY!!! Haha just kidding mam, he stepped on a landmine and died.

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Allie said yesssssssss!

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Why did the man float in the lake? Because he was dead.

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What does a black man, an Irishman, and a Jewish man all have in common? Male genitalia.

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69

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Dear diary, its day 230, the apple supply's are running low, the doctors are closing in, the dentists have been chanting "its time to go to the dentist" all day, I wont be able to hold them back much longer, help.

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Wanna hear a joke? Good, go ask a comedian.

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What's the difference between Skittles and black people? ...I like Skittles.

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What's black and white and red all over? The newspaper classified section after a man has abandoned long, futile job hunt. He has crossed out all the potential jobs with red ink. He was laid off due to the downturn in the economy and will now have to get food stamps, which is very embarrassing for a man who has worked to support his family his entire life.

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roses are red vioets are blue i have chlamydia now so do you....

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Why was the woman terrified of being screened by the TSA? Because she's embarrassingly obese, liked most Americans.

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How Long Is A Chinaman's Name

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a Chinese man an and a southern red neck walked into a country club and the chinese man got jumped and he left with no money

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What is the difference between a jew and a tree a tree is awesome and a jew is a jew

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What's green and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

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Why don't women like to have penises? Evidently women have different tastes than men in what body parts they enjoy having.

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A man heard a thundering sound. It was thunder.

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what's worse than one bee sting? Two bee stings. What's worse than two bee stings? the holocaust. What's worse than the holocaust? three bee stings.

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Why was the little girl screaming? She was on fire. ~G TY

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Why can all black people dance? I have no idea, quite frankly I find that to be a insensitve racial stereotype.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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