how do you get a clown to fall off a swing? hit it with an axe

thumb_up thumb_down -46

Anything Dane Cook says

thumb_up thumb_down +45

why didn't the food in your microwave warm up ? because you didn't press start.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Who's white and tries his best? Steve Nash

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What'd yellow and can"t swim. A black person with a yellow shirt on.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

- What's green and invisible? *holds out empty hand* - This cabbage

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Why women like NBA players so much? Because they have money.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

a Chinese man an and a southern red neck walked into a country club and the chinese man got jumped and he left with no money

thumb_up thumb_down -67

What happens when you swallow a battery? You turn into one.

thumb_up thumb_down -95

What do you feel when you kill a terrorist? Recoil -USMC

thumb_up thumb_down -101

Roses are red, violets are blue I have Alzheimers Roses are red, violets are blue I have Alzheimers

thumb_up thumb_down +96

A black man walks into a bar with a monkey on his shoulder. The bartender asks "Where did you get that?" The monkey replies "Africa, there are thousands of them."

thumb_up thumb_down +76

Knock Knock Who's there? Doctor Ah, come in!

thumb_up thumb_down +6

KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? all my friends break the door down...oh alright then ill answer i guess WHO IS IT? THE REAPER oh s*** dude! [panic face] NO ONES HOME? "In other news tonight, 2 local men found murdered in their living rooms, after looking up common joke style called antee joke. Police say the door was smashed in an obvious sign of forced entry. They seem to have just mysteriously had sudden heart attacks and fainted. heh heh...hey nancy....why did the chicken cross the road? [=< heh heh" "y" "because he thouroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic" "HAHAHAHAHAHAHA *GASP!* X.x dead face "NANCY! NANCY!.....well in other OTHER news ive just murdered nancy, and thats no joke." *runs*

thumb_up thumb_down -46

What do caterpillars fear most? Death.

thumb_up thumb_down +59

What is the best type of pepper? Well, some people say that the yellow pepper is the sweetest and most delicious, although others prefer red, green or orange peppers.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

A homeless man walks into a bar. The bartender felt bad and gave him $20.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

A black man enters a bar. The bartender approaches him, and asks "who will it be?" The black man pulls out a gun and robs the bar, he is then arrested ten days later.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

what happened to the woman who was a prostitute? She was arrested because it is a crime

thumb_up thumb_down +33

What is more scary than an AK47,blood,and 99999 naughty children? Nothing problaly :p

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What do you call a white person on a leash? A toddler.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What did the white guy say to the Mexican when he entered the US? How was your flight?

thumb_up thumb_down +148

Why didn't the lobster share his treasure? Because he did not possess the cranial capacity to understand the concept of ownership; thus, he did not consider the treasure his

thumb_up thumb_down +106

What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Robin, get in the Batmobile.

thumb_up thumb_down +70

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops