A homeless man walks into a bar. The bartender felt bad and gave him $20.

What do you call an German with a knife in his leg ? An ambulance as he has a serious leg wound and will soon die of blood loss

"An alcohol walks into a man. He is a family and is destroying the bar." Says the drunk man to the bartender who wrote it on Anti-joke.com.

a Squirrl climded a tree to get a nut

If Earth is a triangle, then why are trees smart? Because turtles have 4 legs

What do you get when you mix Fruit and Flys? Fries... or Flutes, depending on how many Flys your add.

Whats better than 1 dollar? 2 dollars.

Is your refrigerator running? Go fuck yourself

What did the moon say to the sun? "I am the moon."

What's an Animal? A natural periodic state of rest for the mind and body, in which the eyes usually close and consciousness is completely or partially lost, so that there is a decrease in bodily movement and responsiveness to external stimuli. During sleep the brain in humans and other mammals undergoes a characteristic cycle of brain-wave activity that includes intervals of dreaming. ... are you retarded? yes how did you know?

What'd yellow and can"t swim. A black person with a yellow shirt on.

What's the difference between Skittles and black people? ...I like Skittles.

Did you hear about the toddler that was playing on the swing? He got abducted.

Q: what did the common cold say to the cough? A: you are SO annoying!

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Hey girl, the word of the day is "legs". So let's go home and research the origin of the term and possibly conduct other etymological studies.

An Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman were stuck on a desert island, because they were touring investment property islands off the coast of Dubai and their boat had engine trouble. They were eventually picked up in a helicopter.

what do you call a dead baby in a blender? -taken care of. by: Calee^_^•

- What's green and invisible? *holds out empty hand* - This cabbage

What do you feel when you kill a terrorist? Recoil -USMC

Doorknob.?/111111!!!!hrfuasdyfgasdkhfgawihbrtpaeyrgfai;yegf;gtf L Like or I will killl you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

7>6

How do two porcupines make love? Well actually it's doubtful that porcupines feel higher emotions like love - they pretty much just mate for reproductive purposes.

Roses are red, violets are blue I have Alzheimers Roses are red, violets are blue I have Alzheimers

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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