i went through your mum like a plane on 9,11

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The weels on the bus go...flat

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There once was a man from Nantucket, Whose body parts were all adequate and thus could not perform any odd sexual acts upon himself.

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what happens when two small children jump into a pool full of pedophiles? They splash around and have fun

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Why is it as hot as the sun? Because it is the sun

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What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Diarrhea

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Jesus was nailed to the cross by Roman guards... His disciples were kept behind a line of guards and they could not hear Jesus speak. They can see he was saying something, so they had to get closer to hear what he was saying. John dodged a guard and ran towards Jesus, but a guard cut his leg off with a sword... Peter ran for it and got past John but another guard cut off one of his legs... Matthew saw this opportunity to dodge both guards and jets past both John and Peter and gets to the foot of the cross... Jesus looks down at Matthew and says, "Matthew.... I can see your house from here!"

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Why did the father beat his daughter? To alleviate stress.

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What type of person does a black guy go to when he's sick? The doctor

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Me and me!!!! LOL! i'm a comedian!

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Q: What did Santa give the little boy for Christmas? A: Nothing, he's not real

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waiter there's a fly in my alphabet soup that's not a fly that's a spelling bee

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I've had amnesia as long as I can remember

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How do two blondes stay alive at the bottom of a pool for 30 minutes? They don't and they died

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how do you fit 20 babies into a bucket? you put them into a blender. how do you get them out? chips.

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Why did the Black Man sit at the back of the bus? Because all the other seats were taken.

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What's a terrorists Favorite color Orange

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what do you get when a bear and a man mix a really pissed off bear and a dead man

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how do you kill a zombie? Zombies arent real.

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whats red and black and green all over? a paint job gone bad

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what do you call a man with three eyes and eleven fingers? his name

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What's the difference between a duck? An armchair because the vest has no sleeves.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Luke Futie

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A black guy and Hispanic guy jump off the Empire State Building at the EXACT same time. Who dies first? Who cares?!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops