A black man owns his own night club. He tells the white man to look out for his night club. The white man bangs his head. The black man says, I told you to look out, you have now bumped into my big club that I take out at night time.

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a priest, a rabbi, and a shaman walk into a bar. they all wish me happy birthday bearing gifts. except there's no rabbi. or priest. or shaman. I'm not in a bar. I'm in my room. alone. i spent most of my birthdays that way.

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How did bob survive the explosion? He wasn't at the explosion.

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What's 6+2? 16

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What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.....

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Have you ever heard of Yoda? From 'Attack of the Clones'?

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Doorknob.?/111111!!!!hrfuasdyfgasdkhfgawihbrtpaeyrgfai;yegf;gtf L Like or I will killl you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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What kind of cat has no tail? Manx cat

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What do you get if you cross a black man with a knife? Stabbed.

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Did you hear about the toddler that was playing on the swing? He got abducted.

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An Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman were stuck on a desert island, because they were touring investment property islands off the coast of Dubai and their boat had engine trouble. They were eventually picked up in a helicopter.

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What do you call an German with a knife in his leg ? An ambulance as he has a serious leg wound and will soon die of blood loss

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Dude, you're never going to guess how stupid my friend Philip is! Really? What did he do?? Nothing. Philip will be attending the prestigious Princeton University next year and is therefore an incredibly intelligent human-being. You're an idiot for believing me.

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How do you call the smallest mouse on Earth? James.

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If Earth is a triangle, then why are trees smart? Because turtles have 4 legs

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Robin, get in the Batmobile.

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what happened to the woman who was a prostitute? She was arrested because it is a crime

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Why did the British boy win his talent show? Because he had straight teeth

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What do you call a mexican riding a bike? A cyclist.

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why did the woman cross the road? to get to her full time job as a lawyer.

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i just want thumbs up so i feel better about myself.....

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What do you feel when you kill a terrorist? Recoil -USMC

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What happens when you swallow a battery? You turn into one.

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What's yellow and smells like piss? Piss

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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