Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have a gun, Get in the car.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What is the best part about football The scoring

thumb_up thumb_down -1

A guy is walking on the beach one day when he stubs his toe on something shiny. Digging in the sand he finds an old, tarnished lamp. He takes it home and liberally applies polish, then puts it on his mantlepiece, it completes the look he was going for in his room and he feels like all his wishes have come true. His wife dies in a car accident later that day.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

you wanna know hellen kellers favorite game? Marco Polo!

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What do you call a fly with no wings? A walk.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Two muffins are in an oven. It was a really small batch.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did Kanye West hit Rihanna? He didn't. It was Chris Brown you dumb ****

thumb_up thumb_down -1

what do you call a black guy fixing your electricity an electrician

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What's the difference between a truckload of bowling balls and a truckload of dead babies? One is easier to unload with a pitchfork.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What's the difference between a lawyer and a shark? One is a person and one is a fish. Other than that, not much at all.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

If she's old enough for jail, than shes old enough to rail.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

man 1 walks by man 2 man 1 says hey buddy whats up man 2 responds do i know you man 1 says no but i saw you seeing a movie on friday man 2 says oh cool but wasn't that movie great man 1 responds ya and man 1 and man 2 become best friends plus man 1 only liked man 2 because he was rich!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What looks like a jew, smells like a jew, but claims he isn't jewish? Fletcher Phillips

thumb_up thumb_down -3

knock knock. Who's There? Cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What does the scarecrow from the wizard of oz and a zombie have in common? They both want brains.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

How do you upset a builder? Kill all his family.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

my computer crashed because i never quit... out of anything

thumb_up thumb_down -5

asparagus

thumb_up thumb_down -5

How do you get twenty black men in a tiny car? Saw them into pieces.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

A girl is on the phone with her boyfriend the boy friend has a rash the girl said put ointment on it ointment cures everything the boyfriend responded not cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

There's was an old lady. She fell in a puddle

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why was the black woman poor? Well, she grew up in a wealthy family, but both of her parents died. Her new parents were not very supportive and she began to not care about school. She did not go to college because of this and was not able to get a job. Therefore, she had no money.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Charlie morgans a pussy EDEN HAZARDS A TANK

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What's the difference between a black man and a bunk bed? A bunk bed is stable and can support two children.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops