Q: What do AIDS and rape have in common? A: If you play guard for the Lakers, neither will affect you.

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How did the carpenter do on his exam? Poorly so his parents killed him.

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Dude? What. Dude? What! Wheres my car?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? There was a large dog on its side of the road attempting to harass it.

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Why did Sara fall off the swing? Because she got shot in the heart with a bolt action sniper rifle and died.

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Bobby walked into a bar. He was then escorted out of the bar and arrested because he was underage.

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Two rabbis standing at the buffet cart. The first exclaims "Oy vey, those pork chops look good!". The second shrugs, turns to his friend and remarks, "So do your wife's norks".

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What's brown and rhymes with Snoop? Dr. Dre

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Y did a fat woman cross the rode? To get to McDonalds

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whats sad about three black men driving off a cliff in a cadillac? a cadillac seats five.

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Early yesterday around 10:23am a local women by the name of Bethany Francis Polluch died from a injury to the head. At the scene investigators discovered a tree fell on her causing the trauma. Believe it or not the tree was in the kitchen.

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Three black guys walked into a bar. They all behaved very nicely, payed their bills and left when they where done.

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Q: How do you fit 20 babies into a bowl? A: A blender. Q: How do you get them out? A: Tortilla chips.

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"knock knock" "ill get it honey" "no stay in the kitchen bitch!"

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Why did the boy die at his Halloween party? He was the victim of a drive-by.

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Whats funnier than a dead baby? A dead baby in a clown costum

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John has 38 candy bars. He eats 28. What does he have now? Diabetes. John has Diabetes.

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whats worse than the holocaust? 2 holocausts

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A Jew, a Muslim and an atheist meet at the same bus station. A religious argument breaks out shortly and the three board their respective buses angry and upset. They were a really bad example of religious tolerance.

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Why did Kanye West hit Rihanna? He didn't. It was Chris Brown you dumb ****

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What do you call a fly with no wings? A walk.

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I love you Itachi Uchiha, please let me lick ice cream off of your body and oh crap you're an anime character and not real never mind

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A guy is walking on the beach one day when he stubs his toe on something shiny. Digging in the sand he finds an old, tarnished lamp. He takes it home and liberally applies polish, then puts it on his mantlepiece, it completes the look he was going for in his room and he feels like all his wishes have come true. His wife dies in a car accident later that day.

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What is the best part about football The scoring

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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