What did the dog say to the cat? Nothing, animals can't talk.

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Two kids walked into a bar. One jumped over it

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Why did the bartender kick out the three jews at midnight? Because the bar closes at 11.

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What did dean carmon say to his brother? - I don't know I'm not his brother

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Anti jokes gives me cold sores

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I've got a shotgun with two bullets. I've got two enemies. What do I do with the gun? Go bird hunting.

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Gadaffi

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Knock knock Who's there? 7. And if that's you in there, 6, you better start praying.

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there were 2 sausages in a frying pan. One sausage says it sure is hot in here. The other one says WTF a talking sausage!

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Why is there no African food restaurants in America? Because Africa doesnt have food to begin with

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The awkward moment when a joke doesn't end the way you think it dinosaur.

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Being a demigod and slaying monsters isn't normal, but on myth it is. MYTH: Not even once.

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i want to eat a horse out jaffa cake

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Why wouldn't the man in a wheelchair see out the window? The curtains were closed

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What did the town guard say to the adventurer? "I used to be an adventurer like you, but then I got a full-time job so that I could support my family and spend more time with my children."

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How many light bulbs does it take to screw in a dyslexic child.? DAMN

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A kraut walks out of a synagogue with no one dead

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Why did the woman cross the road? She didn't. They are no roads in the kitchen.

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SCHNARRRRRR!!!!!

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How do you get a giraffe in a fridge? Open the Door, put the giraffe in, close the door How do you get an elephant in a fridge Open the door, take the giraffe out, put the elephant in, close the door There is an animal meeting, one animal doesn't show up. Which animal didn't come? The Elephant, it's still in the fridge You come across a crocodile infested river, how do you get across? You swim across, the crocodiles are at the meeting, Weren't you listening?

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Why did the seal get confused when a spider tried to high five him? Because spiders have eight legs.

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A guy walks into a bar and orders a water because he's the designated driver

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Roses are red Violets are blue In Soviet Russia They had communism

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roses are red violets are black i hope your chest is not as flat as your back.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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