A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear, The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

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How many Jews can you fit in an ash tray? 1 million.

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What did the boy with cancer get for christmas? The video game he really wanted.

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Why did the man float in the lake? Because he had more fat than average, so he was very buoyant

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A man walked into a bar and said, oppa gangnam style That man is now dead

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To visit his dying grandma in the hospital

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What did the three bears say when rhey discovered goldilocks? Nothing. They mauled her to death.

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What did the frog say to the beautiful sleeping princess? Ribbit

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Ok, I'll go ask someone else.

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women playing football?

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yo mama is so fat she went to the doctor and the doctor told her she had diabetes

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What's the difference between a computer and a television?

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GIRLS that think they can out-drink MEN.

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Your mother is so stupid she never finished College thus having to work many menial jobs to provide for her family.

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q: why do mens testicles hang? a: so woman can kick us in em

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have alzheimers, Cheese Toast!

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If I have 10 ice cubes and you have 11 apples, how many pancakes can hit the roof? ...Purple!! Because aliens don't wear hats.

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What's red and smells like blue paint? Red paint.

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What's naughty and rhymes with CORN? Naughty corn.

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An old lady and her son walk into a hospital, only to find it covered in TRICERITOPS SHIT!!!!

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If I lock you in a room and let a snake in under the door, what do you get? A problem.

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what do you call a man with no arms or legs? handicapt

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I like my woman like I like my coffee. Good.

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A man eats a piece of fried chicken A chicken that was days before retirement and had a pregnant wife and two children to look after

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops