What did the 3 bears say when they saw goldielocks sleeping in their bed? Nothing. Bears can't talk so they ate her.

Knock knock Who's there? I don't know go check.

What happened to the man that took too much viagra? His erection lasted longer than 4 hours, he's dead now

roses are red violets are blue however some roses are pink

What did the man say to the bartender when he wanted a beer? Get me a beer.

What has two feet and cant walk? a cripple

A married man, just realizes that his wife is cheating on him while he's away. But just to make sure, he goes into a spy shop to look for a camera to look in on his wife while he's not there. so he goes up to the shop keeper and asks " do you have any video camera's that record in on any place in a house?" the shop keeper says no and the man walks out of the store.

Q. On a scale of 1-100, how immature are you? A. 69.

you wanna know hellen kellers favorite game? Marco Polo!

Why don't Polish women use vibrators? They are extremely conservative Catholics.

A man walks into a bar. The bartender says "why the long face?" He says, "I have acromegaly"

alston wang

What did the Atheist say in church? His best friend's eulogy.

women's rights

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't it was hit by a bus.

I'll give you a nickel to lick my pickle, a dime to take your time and a quarter if I can f*ck you in the ass

What did the little girl do with her puppy? She killed it.

a seal walks into a bar. replace "bar" with "club". and replace "walks into" with "gets bludgeon by."

Why did Sally fall off the swing set? Becasue she had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

Your mom’s so dumb she forgot to update her WordPress installation and now she has pharmaceutical links all over her page.

What do you sit on, sleep on and brush your teeth with? A chair, a bed, and a toothbrush

Why did the dinosaur cross the road? It didn't, there were no roads back then

Wanna hear an oxymoron? Jews for Jesus.

I don't always finish my sentences but when I do...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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