The NHL playoffs

What's worse than falling off your bike? Getting hit by a truck.

whats cheese thats not yours? the one in the toilet.

Your momma is so fat that she is on a diet and exercises regularly.

Bob was in trouble. He forgot his wedding anniversary. His wife was really pissed. She told him "Tomorrow morning, I expect to find a gift in the driveway that goes from 0 to 200 in 6 seconds AND IT BETTER BE THERE !!" The next morning he got up early and left for work. When his wife woke up, she looked out the window and sure enough it was car. The End

Knock knock Whos there? ... You got ding dong ditched

Why did the girl fall out of the swing? Because she didn't have any arms.

What's worse than biting into your apple and realising it has a worm in it? subsequently realising that the worm is a Swamp Adder, the worlds smallest venemous snake. Then you look up and realise you're in the Sahara Desert. You wonder where the snake came from and how it got in the apple.. Then you slowly die.

A man walks into a bra, he is an alcoholic and is destroying his family

What was the sadest part about the four blacks who drove off a cliff in a cadilac? -The car sat five

biggest lie in the world. I love you grandma.

So this guy's taking a hooker back to a hotel room, right? The woman turns out to be a federal agent investigating prostitution in inner-city inviornments, and the man is promptly arrested. He is now subject to a large fine and 90 days in a county jail.

Chuck Norris watches TV.

A rabbit enters in apharmacy and asks for a carrot. The man says:"There aren´t any carrots in here." In the next two days the same happens, but the man replies that he'll hammer the rabbit if he comes back. In the other day, the rabbit is found dead with a bloody hammer nearby.

Roses are red, I want a gravestone, nobody loves me, forever alone

what do you call a black pilot? a pilot

What do you call a black man with gold teeth? Crunchie

Why did Hitler like his steak well done? Because like many people, he didn't like the sight of blood in his steaks.

Why is Jesus not real? Because Chuck Norris is still alive.

why did the chicken cross the road. why? because he felt like it

what did the therapist say to the other therapist? were both therapists.

What's the difference between Harry Potter and the Jews? Harry Potter can escape the chambers.

A bass player walks past a bar.......... "hey, it could happen"...

What did the Black man say when he just got home from work? "Hi honey, I just got home from work."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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