Q: What would you do for a Klondike bar? A: I would make the slightly onerous journey to the local grocery establishment and pay my hard-earned money to procure a dessert which I quite enjoy.

If frogs weren't alive, there wouldn't be any frogs left on earth.

What did the boy Tell to his friends? Nothing. He has noone.

Why did the eighty year old man climb into a fridge? Because he wanted to.

Yo mamma's so black, and that's ok. We're all different and unique.

A man walked into a store and asked if he could use the restroom. They found this acceptable and let him use it.

What happens when you have fish and a rhino mate? Nothing, that is physically impossible, a rhino is a lot bigger than a fish and it would not be possible for a rhino to do that with a fish considering a rhino can't breathe under water and a fish can't breath with out air.

yo mamas so ugly she turned madoosa into stone

Why did the all the fish in the lake die? A pesticide bioaccumulated through the food chain.

Why was there a lion in the bathroom? Because I threw a refrigerator at it and stapled a frog to its butthole, all while it was being chased by a 10 foot scorpion and a purple salmon that only had 1 eye.

What is worse than finding 10 dead babies nailed to a tree? Finding 1 dead baby nailed to 10 trees.

Roses are red, violets are blue something stinks and I think it's you!

Darude - Sandstorm

What did the deaf, dumb, blind, parapalegic kid get for Christmas? Cancer

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It was hit by a car.

What did Jesus say to his disciples at the Last Supper? Go to Hell.

Two men walk into a bar. The third one ducks.

What did Chuck Norris say to the boy? Sure I'll sign your t-shirt!

An Englishman an Irishman and a Scotsman went in a hot air balloon and had a magical afternoon that none of them will ever forget, except the Scotsman because he fell out during take off and is now in a coma.

What do you call it when 1 person has an imaginary friend? A mental disorder. What do you call it when 1 billion people have an imaginary friend? A Religion.

September 8, 2011 Amy Winehouse: 46 days sober. Date of death: July 23, 2011

Why was Jesus able to walk on water? Because he was the son of God and therefore devine, he can do whatever he pleases

The Holocaust.

A boy writes an anti-joke. It is not funny. He sees his friends teasing him about the jokes stupidity. He promptly pokes his eyes out with a dull broom stick. He wakes up the next morning and doesnt give a crap about the prior days events. Mainly because he can no longer see.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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