When Life gives you lemons... Squeeze the juice right back into Life's eyes!

What did the fish say when it hit the wall? "Dam."

How do you upset a builder? Kill all his family.

There is a white man, a black guy, and an Asian in a car. It got into an accident who did it? Asian dude

What's the difference between a zebra and a newspaper? Everything.

A guy hit his elbow. Judaism.

you're a loser >>>>>>>>>>>

i went through your mum like a plane on 9,11

Knock Knock Who's there? Hitler. Good.

Why did the tree fall down? Because no one caught it.

Whats yellow and cant swim? a bulldozer

Two strangers are sitting at a bar having a drink. One is a young, fat, red-headed guy named Fred. The other is an elderly grey-haired man. After a while, Fred turns to the old man and awkwardly asks: "Excuse me sir would ya' mind givin me some advice? There's this girl who has sat next to me on the bus every morning for the past three months. She's the most beautiful woman I have ever seen. She always smiles and winks at me. I wannna ask her on a date but every time I go to do it I freeze. I just don't know what to say. I'm sorry to bother you, but I'm falling for this girl and I don't know what in the world to do. Any tips?" The old man continues to sit quietly, slowly sipping his drink. After a while the old man looks at Fred. "Hmmm" says the old man, as he thinks over Fred's question. "What is your name son?" He asks Fred. "It's Fred sir," replies Fred. "Hmmm," the old man says again as he continues to think over Fred's question. The old man then stands up, takes out a gun, and shoots Fred in the face. Fred never saw it coming.

Knock,Knock Whos there ? Hola Holo who ? Holocaust Hahahaha

You best friend has a bladder disease. You ask him how he got it. He says " I was watching the superbowl and had to go, but I didn't want to miss the commercials. So it was either watching the game and getting a bladder disease that would end up killing me or going to the bathroom . Now you know where i went wrong."

What's easier to get than a broke hooker on the side of the street? Osama Bin Laden.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was making a suicide attempt.

Guy 1: Yo dawg Guy 2: DID yOU JUST FUCKING CALL ME A DOG>/?>/???? Guy 3: Yea

How come Michael Jackson can draw a perfect circle? He likes little BOYS.

What's White and can't climb up a tree? A fridge.

Why is it called a tea kettle Because it is a kettle and you make tea in it

how do you know your at a gay picnic. the hotdogs smell like shit.

Hi

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ss sa asd g dg asd g asd g sdg s dg sad g ads g s dg sad g sadg as dg as dg sdg ds gs dg sdg sd g sdg sd g sdg ds gsd g ds g sdg sd g sdg sd g sdg as sdg know i'm sayin?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


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MOAR??

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