yo mamas so ugly she turned madoosa into stone

Why does an elephant lay on it's back with its feet in the air? To trip birds.

An Englishman an Irishman and a Scotsman went in a hot air balloon and had a magical afternoon that none of them will ever forget, except the Scotsman because he fell out during take off and is now in a coma.

What do you call it when 1 person has an imaginary friend? A mental disorder. What do you call it when 1 billion people have an imaginary friend? A Religion.

a horse walks into a bar except it wasn't a horse it was Sarah Jessica Parker

A man dies and goes to heaven. This is an assumption based on religious faith.

there was a blond, a brunette, and a redhead at the edge of a cliff The blond being stupid jumped off the cliff and broke every bone in her body

A horse walks into a bar... it was accompanied by a blind man for it was a seeing eye pony and the bartender who was not tolerant to blind people turned away the man causing him to recieve dirty glances from the kindly patrons of the bar.

A bass player walks past a bar.......... "hey, it could happen"...

Oh hot damn, this is my jam. Strawberry, to be specific.

what do you call a black pilot? a pilot

Why did the all the fish in the lake die? A pesticide bioaccumulated through the food chain.

I am Skaldak!

A pregnant woman goes to the hospital to deliver a baby. It is born perfectly normal and healthy, the doctor looks at the mother and father offering them congratulations as he hands them a 9 lb 10 oz baby boy. The mother wanted a girl, but she instead develops post part em depression. She goes through years of psychotherapy to again become well adjusted, her second child is a girl.

A:what happens when you throw a black guy down from a sky-scraper Q:he dies

ur gay and this joke sucks

Q: What would you do for a Klondike bar? A: I would make the slightly onerous journey to the local grocery establishment and pay my hard-earned money to procure a dessert which I quite enjoy.

Why did the girl fall off of the swing? Why was the swing in the kitchen?

What do you get when you cross a polar bear and a vampire? A Vampire Polar Bear.

What's worse than losing your phone? Getting raped anal until phones fall out

What was the sadest part about the four blacks who drove off a cliff in a cadilac? -The car sat five

Q:How many prostitutes does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: Two

Why didn't the boy respond to the text? His phone had run out of charge.

biggest lie in the world. I love you grandma.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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