What do you call a dog with no arms or legs? It doesn't matter what you call him. He won't come.

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What did the Polar Bear say when he slid off the iceberg? Radio

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What's green and if it falls out of a tree it kills you? A pool table.

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My wife crashed the car while listening to Adele last night. She ended up rolling in the jeep.

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h

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What do you call a fish that is missing an eye. fsh.

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why would you thank the KKK because they killed the president

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What did the finger say to the thumb? Nothing, fingers can't talk.

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69

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Wha'ts Slippery when wet? A Wet Slipper.

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what did the boy from a computer recycling unit in china get on his birthday? Pancreatic cancer.

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Adolf Hitler was a humanitarian.

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What do Asians eat for dinner? Home cooked meals

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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Santa Claus, "Ho ho ho!" Asain Santa Claus, "Hohohohohohohoho!" Pedophile Santa Claus, "Ho ho ho! Come and sit on my lap children!" Dyslexic Santa Claus, "Oh oh oh! Merry Shitcrams!" Narcopleptic Santa Claus, "Ho ho..." *snores*. Black Santa Claus, well, I wouldn't like the idea of a black fat guy breaking into my house, eating my cookies, drinking my milk, and leaving presents under my tree. Would you?

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What did the German say to the Jew? I'm not quite sure; I don't speak German.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I rhyme like lil Wayne Fridge

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why was 6 afraid of 7? because 7 8 9

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Two muffins are in an oven. How does that even work? Muffin pans come with either 6 or 12 muffin holders.

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What's the best position to be in while being attacked by a bear? invisible

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What comes to mind when you say the word "Mind?" Your Mind

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A man goes to a doctor to check about an itch on his testicles. Turns out it was just a rash and is promptly prescribed medication and it clears up in a week.

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What did the teacher tell the failing student? You will most likely be kicked out of our school and have no further education and be subjected to a low-level career.

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A squirrel got killed by getting hit by a truck haha its funny cuz the squirrel died

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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