wat did the candle say to the lighter? nothing candles cant speak because they are inamimate objects, even so i think a candle would just scream anyway, would you buy a screaming candle?

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was disowned by his family due to his drug addiction and had nowhere else to go.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Why is that blond girl so dumb? Because she has fetal alcohol syndrome.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

A:what happens when you throw a black guy down from sky-scraper Q:he dies

thumb_up thumb_down -38

How many monkeys can play COD at once? It depends on how many controllers you have.

thumb_up thumb_down -40

What couldn't Little Timmy see the pirate movie? Because Little Timmy was blind.

thumb_up thumb_down -44

What's worse than the front page of anti-joke.com? The 4945th page of anti-joke.com, as those jokes have been rated poorly by other users.

thumb_up thumb_down -128

What's white and very boney? A bone

thumb_up thumb_down +75

Why did the red head smoke a lot of meth? He had extreme psychological disorders due to years of abuse from peers and even family. He also had severe ADHD and had an extremely addictive personality type which made him succeptable to drug abuse. After years of therapy and failed family interventions, he dies from a meth OD.

thumb_up thumb_down +63

What did the gravel say to the road? Give me the D.

thumb_up thumb_down +63

Knock knock Who's there? The police, we know you've been pirating movies.

thumb_up thumb_down +53

. Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry man passes, takes a look at the muffins lifts his shoulders and walks away. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin was poisoned.

thumb_up thumb_down +51

Why can't Stevie Wonder drive? There is no steering wheel at the back of the bus.

thumb_up thumb_down +51

Why did the rabbit like to wear shoes? It doesn't.

thumb_up thumb_down +51

What is so sad about 5 black people going over a cliff in a Cadaliac? That was my Cadaliac

thumb_up thumb_down +49

Wanna hear something half funny 34.5

thumb_up thumb_down +49

Why did the chicken cross the street? It didn't. It got hit by a car.

thumb_up thumb_down +49

There's no "i" in tim.

thumb_up thumb_down +45

Why couldn't the little boy skate? He had cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +45

My aunt used to say slow and steady wins the race she died in a fire

thumb_up thumb_down +43

What did Steven Hawking say to God after he died? Nothing. He can't talk.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Why did the boy cross the road Because he needed to get to the bus stop

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Paul Dylan King!

thumb_up thumb_down +41

BWAT

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops