Mel Gibson is awoken by the ringing of his telephone he proceeds to have a nice conversation with his wife.

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Q: What's black and can crash into you A: a black guy in a car

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Roses are red, violets are blue something stinks and I think it's you!

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I'm not here.

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What do you call a dead cat on the side of the road? Kitty litter

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Why does an elephant lay on it's back with its feet in the air? To trip birds.

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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A:what happens when you throw a black guy down from a sky-scraper Q:he dies

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A blond and a brunette fall off a cliff. Who hits the ground first? Neither. They hit the ground at the exact same time due to the laws of physics

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C'est l'histoire d'un français paumé qui se retrouve sur un site anglais.

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How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb? Trick question! Feminists can't change anything.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a registered sex offender.

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Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

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waiter: can I get you something to drink? customer: I'll have a coke. waiter: is pepsi okay? customer: is monopoly money okay?

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Roses are red Dead bodies are blue You can't see me But I see you

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A pregnant woman goes to the hospital to deliver a baby. It is born perfectly normal and healthy, the doctor looks at the mother and father offering them congratulations as he hands them a 9 lb 10 oz baby boy. The mother wanted a girl, but she instead develops post part em depression. She goes through years of psychotherapy to again become well adjusted, her second child is a girl.

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What do you get when you cross a cat with a giraffe? A genetically unstable animal that dies shortly after birth.

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Lol, thats sweet, you making me nervous in a good way now. No, the thing is that I need to use this crap every morning, yeah, but its late here now, and since I was born with this condition, remembering is far easier than forgetting, and while the bleeding has stopped now, I was never in any pain whatsoever, and the bleeding would have stopped eventually because of you know... Coagulation? But, if I lets say spend a week without my meds, things would look pretty ugly. I get the meds for cheap, by my new doctor since the old one was a bitch... Excuse me, can we take five minutes? I know I said I would return last time and did not, but I will, I am just a bit... Well, I need a bit more blood in my body right now, I am fine, no danger... If I where I would not be chatting here, but getting my ass of to the doc.

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What did the boy Tell to his friends? Nothing. He has noone.

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Yo mamma's so black, and that's ok. We're all different and unique.

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roses are red violets are blue i've got a boner and it raging for you

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What's the best anti joke? this one

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What do you do if Zombies are chasing you and your friend? Trip the friend.

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There was a girl who dumped her diver boyfriend because she couldn’t get him to give her a pearl out of an oyster. This particularly female has rather high expectations for her significant others.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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