Roses are red, I want a gravestone, nobody loves me, forever alone

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a registered sex offender.

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Why doesn't Mexico have a navy? Because cardboard doesn't float!

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What did the deaf, dumb, blind, parapalegic kid get for Christmas? Cancer

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Why did the blond crave hotdogs for breakfast? She was likely suffering a sodium deficiency from violently throwing up the night before.

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What is worse than finding 10 dead babies nailed to a tree? Finding 1 dead baby nailed to 10 trees.

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C'est l'histoire d'un français paumé qui se retrouve sur un site anglais.

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Why did the girl fall out of the swing? Because she didn't have any arms.

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How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb? Trick question! Feminists can't change anything.

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yaa tsi tsup ari dik ari dull an dik ari dill an dits tan dool la dippyduppy dull la roop uttyroopy la goorigan gook aya gittygangool arup cha cha adippydappydill la baritztandill lan den lan doe a barik kata barip pari baribadeebadeebadee standen lan doe ya baril las ten lan day a doe la babadeadevadevadevaduv ya vou what is that little las day lan doe badakadagadaga doo doo day a doe

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There was a girl who dumped her diver boyfriend because she couldn’t get him to give her a pearl out of an oyster. This particularly female has rather high expectations for her significant others.

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A blond and a brunette fall off a cliff. Who hits the ground first? Neither. They hit the ground at the exact same time due to the laws of physics

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What do you get when you cross a Shake Weight with Parkinson's Disease? You get a sentence that doesn't explain the end of the joke and leaves you without any closure.

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Roses are red, violets are blue something stinks and I think it's you!

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A man dies and goes to heaven. This is an assumption based on religious faith.

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A man walks into an anti Joke.

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What did the guy with Alzheimer's say to his.... Wait, I forgot the joke

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Lol, thats sweet, you making me nervous in a good way now. No, the thing is that I need to use this crap every morning, yeah, but its late here now, and since I was born with this condition, remembering is far easier than forgetting, and while the bleeding has stopped now, I was never in any pain whatsoever, and the bleeding would have stopped eventually because of you know... Coagulation? But, if I lets say spend a week without my meds, things would look pretty ugly. I get the meds for cheap, by my new doctor since the old one was a bitch... Excuse me, can we take five minutes? I know I said I would return last time and did not, but I will, I am just a bit... Well, I need a bit more blood in my body right now, I am fine, no danger... If I where I would not be chatting here, but getting my ass of to the doc.

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What's as bad as doing something you don't like? Doing another thing you don't like

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A:what happens when you throw a black guy down from a sky-scraper Q:he dies

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What do you get when you cross a cat with a giraffe? A genetically unstable animal that dies shortly after birth.

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Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

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What's better than a pile of dead babies? Anything.

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because I threw a fridge at her.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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