Why did the chicken cross the road? Having lost his job, wife, and general sanity, he resorted to suicide by car accident.

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know. I didn't ask him.

What's the difference between a black guy and a picnic table? Many things, really. Beginning with simple structural features such as the number of legs, of which there happen to be four on a generic picnic table, and two on a human being. One might observe that a typical african american male is between 5'8" and 6'2" in total length, whereas a picnic table, being made to support 6-8 people will generally be slightly longer. A black guy will generally be pictured standing upright. A picnic table is usually horizontally laid out upon a flat surface. The former is living or dead, the latter is usually nonliving, processed wood or metal. The former may move about from day to day of its own accord, the latter is completely stationary, and indeed very difficult to relocate, etc.

Sarah Palin is President

Games stop telling me to press any key to continue. That key doesn't exist.

why did the black man buy a gun? he was a hunter.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 recently got out of prison for violent rape.

Why did the math teacher cry during 6th period? He was held at gunpoint.

What happens when you combine a chainsaw and a baby? 30 years to life

What is this a book??!!! What am I supposed to do...... READ IT?????!!!!!!!!!

What did the gravel say to the road? Give me the D.

GLaDOS: So... this cat loves lasagna so much that he eats all of the lasagna in his house. Okay, apparently it's not the cat's house or his lasagna. Oh good! The man who owns the lasagna is furious! GLaDOS: The end. GLaDOS: The end? GLaDOS: That's not funny. GLaDOS: Do either of you feel like laughing? GLaDOS: Alright, I'm pulling you out. GLaDOS: Welcome back. While you were dead, I reworked the cartoon. It's up on the screen. GLaDOS: As you can see, in my version the man points out to the cat that the house is equipped with deadly neurotoxin dispensers. GLaDOS: At which point the cat reflects on the time he ate all of the man's lasagna and feels remorse. GLaDOS: Briefly. GLaDOS: Reactions? GLaDOS: Yes, it's funny because most of it actually happened.

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What time is it when an elephant sits on your car? 12:00

What do you call a bay that got run over by a train? Thomas

In Soviet Russia, you shit on bird.

Q:why do bananas where sunscreen? A:beacause they peel!!haha

What's the same between a plum and a rabbit? They are both purple, except for the rabbit.

roses are flowers violets are too violets are purple not fuing blue

The burgler walked into the house. Nobody noticed the initial intrusion. The burgler quickly left. The family of which was stolen from woke up the next day and enjoyed a hearty breakfast of grains, oats, and barley without a worry on anyone's mind.

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

Paul Dylan King!

Have you ever tried ethiopian food? No. Neither have they

Why do all black people have nightmares? Beacause we killed the only one with a dream..

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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