How any blondes dose it take to screw in a lightbulb? 3 one to hold the light bulb and two to rotate the ladder

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man: so where did you two meet? man tied to flower: in the produce section.

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Why was 1 afraid of 2? Because 234!

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Sarah Palin is President

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How did the blonde screw in a lightbulb? She didn't, she fell and broke her neck and went to a hospital. Thus you should not laugh.

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Two black guys walk into a bar and arrest the under age drinkers

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What is the answer to the question of Life, the Universe and Everything? That doesn't make any sense.

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Why cant Michael Jackson take flying lessons? Because he overdosed on pain killers, and is now dead.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. Onions stink. And so do you.

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Why did the bunny eat his food

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What do you call a puppy with no eyes? Ugly,

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Why are elephants big, grey, and wrinkled? Because if they were small, white, and round they'd be called aspirin.

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in the begining... god made some stuff

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What's the worst thing a 13 year old could do? Have their Bar Mitzvah in Nazi Germany.

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Did you hear that joke about Helen Keller? Neither did she.

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The burgler walked into the house. Nobody noticed the initial intrusion. The burgler quickly left. The family of which was stolen from woke up the next day and enjoyed a hearty breakfast of grains, oats, and barley without a worry on anyone's mind.

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My wife crashed the car while listening to Adele last night. She ended up rolling in the jeep.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have 5 fingers, The middle one's for you!

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Why did Jill fall off the swing? She had no arms. Why didn't Jill get up? She had no legs. Why didn't anyone help Jill up? She had no friends.

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The lemons on the tree are ripe. They will be picked.

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What do you get when you cross a dog and a cat? A hybrid animal that can never exist to do each species own genetic make-up which would subsequently reject the other's. I.E. The cat would reject the dog sperm from ever fertilizing and the dog would reject cat sperm.

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What is worse than a Catholic priest being caught red handed raping 7 kids? 1. Thou shall not steal. 2. Thou shall be kindeth to thy neigbour... 3. Not attending to church is a sin... Moral: Catholic priests need to get their priorities straight... or gay, just not pedo!

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Paul Dylan King!

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Q: What's worse than 10 dead babies in a tree? A: I'm sure there are lots of things.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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