Why did the baby cross the road? It doesn't matter. He was hit by a bus.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? No. Well neither has he.

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In Soviet Russia, you shit on bird.

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Whats big, brown and can jump really high... A kangaroo

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What do you do when a guy pulls up in a van with piercings and a gay lisp, what do you do? Get in the van.

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What is worse than being ran over by a bus? Nothing really.

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what has two legs and bleeds? half a dog

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Why is this an anti-joke? Are you laughing? Exactly.

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Knock knock Whose there? you you who you know who you are

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What's the difference between a women's running team and a band of pygmies? Quite a lot.

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Q: Why was Seven afraid of Eight? A: He was octophobic.

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What does a person say before they die? Whatever their last word is

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There once was a rich man who owned a really big mansion, he's a very organised man and likes routine, every day at 6.30pm he goes for an hour long jog. One day he goes out for his jog, when he gets back his mansion is on fire and he can see a little orange man running away in the distance. But he thinks nothing of it. The man has lost a lot of money, but can still afford to move into a slighty smaller, yet still very large house. The next day he goes out for his jog and when he gets back his big house is on fire and again, he sees the little orange man running away in the distance. He thinks nothing of it, but has now lost even more money, and has to move into a regular size house. The next day he goes out for his jog, when he gets back his house is on fire and again he sees the little orange man running away in the distance. He thinks nothing of it and has lost even more money. He is really gutted by this point and now has to move into a single bedroom flat. The next day he goes out for his jog, when he gets back his flat is on fire and again he sees a little orange man running away in the distance. He still thinks nothing of it and has now lost all his money, and has to move into a cardboard box under a bridge. The next day he goes out for his jog, when he gets back his cardboard box is on fire and again he sees a little orange man running away in the distance. He is sick of this and decides to chase the little orange man. When he catches him he tackles him to the ground, turns him over and asks.. did you burn down my mansion, my big house, my average sized house, my flat, and my box? The little orange man replies no.

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How did Hitler like his steaks? He didn't like steaks, he was a vegetarian.

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What do you call an asian guy in a police uniform? A police officer.

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Knock Knock Come in, the door's open.

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sdrawkcab ekoj siht tleps I whether you like it or not

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What did the teacher tell the failing student? You will most likely be kicked out of our school and have no further education and be subjected to a low-level career.

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Q: What do you call a man with no arms or legs in a pool? A: A man with no arms or legs in a pool.

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Kid: Hey,can i have all the answers to this test please. Teacher: What the hell kid im the fricken teacher.

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What is the biggest lie in the universe? I love you.

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What did the boy with no arms or legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

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What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball? Two young men ignoring societies expectations of them and instead choosing to play the sport they enjoy the most.

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Wanna Hear A Joke ? Afgan

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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