Q: How much does a hipster weigh? A: It varies largely by hipster, the same way it does with any other person.

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There once was a man from Bangkok, who hated limericks.

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what did the cancer patient get for christmas. -an amputation. Luckily, he was cured of cancer due to the amputation, but died 3 days later in a tragic car accident

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Whats worse than getting negative 5 on your calculus test? Coming up positive on your Chlamydia test.

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How many nails does it take to build a house? As many as it takes to get the job done.

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Why is Ellen so funny? Because she is a comedian.

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Why can't dinosaurs talk? Because they're dead.

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A boy watches as a firefighter saves a little girl from a fire and looks at his mom saying "I want to be a firefighter when i grow up mommy" The mom looks down and replies "Silly kid you're not gunna grow up you have leukemia."

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Why did Billy get a 102% on his Algebra test? He got all of the questions correct including the bonus question. Oh, and he slept with the teacher.

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why did the chicken cross the road?? to go shopping for some aspirin because one of his children recently developed a raging headache and it was only logical for him to go to the pharmacy that was conveniantly placed across the road.

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Do you want to hear a joke? Yes? Well that's probably why you came to this site.

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So two muffins are in an oven. They get baked.

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When is a bus not a bus? When it explodes.

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A Mexican walks into a club.

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How many cops does it take to change a lightbulb? 1

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Q:What did the policemen say to the other policemen? A:Safe

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Why was poor justin killed His mother kicked him into a pool of blood-thirsty aligators.

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An Asian oceanographer went scuba diving in the Pacific Ocean. Three days later the coast guard found his remains torn apart by sharks.

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Your argument is invalid, but I will allow you your opinion nonetheless.

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Person 1: Do you want to hear a joke? Person 2: Sure! Person:1: That was the joke... You missed it!!!!!

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A student goes up to the teacher because he has to go to the washroom. The teacher tells him that he has to sing the ABC's before he can go. So the boy sings, "ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ." The teacher said he did a perfect job and could go to the washroom. The boy went on to become a billionaire. Congrats!

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A plane crashes on the border of the United States and Canada. Where do they bury the survivors? Why would they bury the survivors? THEY'RE ALIVE

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what do you call a Ukranian woman without a visa? my maid

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why did the man paint his house? because he never wanted to paint his house

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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