Waiter! What's this fly doing in my soup? He's not doing anything, sir. He's dead.

Okay chan, you can have it then, I am tired.

if it takes skill to trip over a flat surface, i have no skill...

What did the boy with cancer get for christmas? -A haircut

Why did the lemming jump off a cliff? Because he was suicidal.

An Asian woman is driving home from work. She gets in an accident and is killed instantly. Her family is traumatized.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Blood is red also Nothing else is blue

Hitler was Jewish.

In the beginning God created the heavens and the Earth. He then created the water, the sky, land, sea creatures, land creatures and humans. He rested.

Yo mama is so fat, she had to get liposuction.

why did the chicken cross the road? its a chicken so it will wonder when not properly fenced in

What is the difference between a grape and an elephant? They are both grapes, except for the elephant.

If thin people skinny dip, what do fat people do? Sink

If I lock you in a room and let a snake in under the door, what do you get? A problem.

I have alzheimers but atleast I don't have alzheimers

A white man bumps into an Asian man while walking down the street. They have a brief chat. As they part ways, the white man says, "Facebook me!" The Asian man replies, "Due to my socio-economic situation I cannot currently afford an Internet service." So they exchange telephone numbers.

There are 4 people in a crashing plane, but there are only 3 parachutes. But, the teenage girl says she is depressed and cannot go on. The older woman breaks down into tears because she is reminded of her rough child hood. The two 21 year old twins start crying, too, because they were corrupted by their alcoholic father who would come home and abuse their family. As they were all crying, the two pilots and the flight attendant took the parachutes and jumped. The older woman realized she went to flight school when she was young so she took control. They were are happy and drank a little bit too much alcohol and got drunk. The pilot also drunk and crashed into a huge skyscraper. This catastrophe was later named 9/11.

A fire at a chinese high school caused the death of many children. The drill was unsucessful.

-Knock knock -Go away -*Breaks door and shoots*

What did the Queen of England say when here servant died? Another one bites the dust!

Susie has Autism

Roses are red, Violets are PURPLE.

Amy Winehouse has been sober for 2 weeks now.

Larry: Why did the chick cross the road? Jeff: Chick? Don't you mean chicken? Larry: Just answer the question. Jeff: Um, why? Larry: Wrong.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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