RULES: #1) have fun #2) safety first

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why did the chicken cross the road Kill yoself

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You wanna hear a clean joke? I took a bath with bubbles. Wanna hear a dirty joke? I slipped in mud. Wanna hear an even dirtier joke? Bubbles is a guy..

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It is green and it is attached to a fence? Green paint

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How many jews can you fit in a car? However many seats there are

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Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get surgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

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Why did the woman drop her baby? she had a stroke.

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What do you call a Colombian who sells drugs? A pharmacist.

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holly, a japanese boy and an american boy walked into a internet cafe. They then began to play runescape so they could train together and trade rare items.

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Knock knock! Who's there? Your neighbor My neighbor who? I already told you, it's pronounced "Wu". I'm very sorry, Mr. Wu

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What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball? Two young men ignoring societies expectations of them and instead choosing to play the sport they enjoy the most.

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Who broke into the village's homes and smashed all of the vases? Link did.

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timmy: a duck walks up to a lemon stand and says to the man running the stand hey... Paul: what r u talking about its duck it can't talk

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What's worse than a School Bus accident? The Holocaust.

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What has 5 legs, 4 eyes, and 8 stomachs? Nothing.

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Pickles

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Why did Tommy cry? His tear glands emptied out of his eyes

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream cone? He got hit by a bus.

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What do you call a tree with all of it's branches down? A tree with all of it's branches down.

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Knock Knock. Whos there? Death

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How many blondes does is take to screw a man? one and a condem

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What's faster than a Mexican running away with your T.V.? An Airplane

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How do you know when a guy wants to have sex with you? When he rapes you

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Babies are like landmines; when you step on them they explode.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops